Always believe in the power of love to get people to do some really stupid fucking shit.
Spread positive vibes throughout the workplace by lying to everyone about how great they are.
Surround yourself with happy, positive people! You never know when one will snap and start killing and you need to keep an eye on them.
I sincerely hope no one reading this dies today but if you do die, make it fucking awesome.
We're all chewed food digesting in the gut of a heartless universe, so GET OUT THERE AND FUCKING ENJOY SOMETHING BEFORE YOU TURN TO SHIT.
We're still cavemen. In a physical sense, we have not evolved at all. Now our intellect is fighting our urge to rub our genitals on shit.
Generosity is good for the soul. Give someone sweet booty-loving tonight!
Simple sex tip: always ignore the recommended serving size.