During his 21-hour "this is not a filibuster but it will make me look cool like Wendy Davis" verbal masturbation session, Senator Rafael "Ted" Cruz made a number of cultural references. Actually, quite a large number, because he wasn't held to the standards that Representative Davis (D-Texas) was held to, like staying on point and not just rambling about any random bullshit that pops into your head, but I digress.
Aside from "the trees are just the right height",,,,oh, sorry, wrong loser, I meant to say “I like their little burgers … I’m a big fan of eating White Castle burgers.”, Sen. Cruz also mentioned Ashton Kutcher's Teen Choice Awards speech, as well as Dr. Suess' "Green Eggs and Ham."
Both references were major fails for a Tea-Party Republican like Mr. Cruz. (For all the money they spend on consultants, you'd think at least ONE of them would give them the 'heads up' about 'teh Google.) Let's take a look at what went wrong:
OK, here we go:
So, we all remember when Tea Partiers were salivating at the mouth (yes, I know that's redundant) over Ashton Kutcher's speech. He talked about work - hard work, and it was embraced by the 'right' because we all know they fucking invented 'hard work', while the rest of us lay around chatting with our friends on our Obamaphones deciding how much lobster we should buy with our food stamps.
Cruz:
"He talked about the importance of work," Cruz continued. "And his speech was so remarkable that I took the opportunity to tweet it out. Because frankly, Mr. President, Ashton Kutcher can reach young people in a way that I never can, that you never can, that no member of this Senate can. And I thought the message was important, and it was important about a principal that was imperiled by Obamacare."
Uh, oh, Ted! The right is going crazy right now because a school showed students a video made by Oprah Winfrey in 2009 called
"I Pledge."
Ashton Kutcher's politics would have Ayn Rand rolling in her grave!
And, just for icing on the cake of a video that supports helping people in need, Ashton Kutcher and his then-wife Demi Moore say:
"I pledge...to be a servant to our President, and all mankind."
Mr. Cruz also quoted
Dr. Seuss,
particularly "Green Eggs and Ham." This was a clearly thought-out
clever move by team Cruz, because he actually brought a copy of the book with him. I find that strange, because he only read two lines:
I do not like green eggs and ham, I do not like them, Sam I Am
To point out the obvious, the story is about an arrogant asshole who decides he doesn't like something (in this case, Obamacare!) before he tries it.
Methinks Mr. Cruz should have taken a look into the politics of "Dr. Seuss" (Theodor Seuss Geisel ) before trying to make him a posthumous poster child for his 'I got mine, so fuck everybody else' style of politics:
Geisel was a liberal Democrat and a supporter of President Franklin D. Roosevelt and the New Deal. His early political cartoons show a passionate opposition to fascism, and he urged action against it both before and after the United States entered World War II. His cartoons portrayed the fear of communism as overstated, finding greater threats in the House Un-American Activities Committee and those who threatened to cut the US "life line"[29] to Stalin and the USSR, whom he once depicted as a porter carrying "our war load".[28]
Ouch!
In 1948, after living and working in Hollywood for years, Geisel moved to La Jolla, California. It is said that when he went to register to vote in La Jolla, some Republican friends called him over to where they were registering voters, but Geisel said, "You, my friends, are over there, but I am going over here [to the Democratic registration]
That's gonna leave a mark.
They're really gonna lose it when they hear about this:
The line "A person's a person, no matter how small!!" from Horton Hears a Who! has been used widely as a slogan by the anti-abortion movement in the U.S., despite the objections of Geisel's widow. While Geisel preferred to let his work speak for itself, he did occasionally speak out to protect his characters from exploitation. In 1986 when the line was first used by the pro-life movement, he demanded a retraction and received one
Hey, I get it. When you have no cultural icons better than Ayn Rand and the least talented of the Baldwin brothers, you are forced to co-opt
our people and make your idiot followers think they're part of the team. Like I said, I 'get it.'
That said, keep your fuckin' hands off of Dr. Seuss....he's one of ours. And don't even get me started about the Tea Party's new-found appreciation for George Orwell. (Where were they when the previous administration got the ball rolling?)
George Orwell's real name was Eric Blair, and his politics would make you shit in your tri-corner hat.
UPDATE: Sarah ...what's her name???...Payme, or something, just FB'd me and said:
Don't reTweet, reload!
.
I don't know what that means.
10:10 AM PT: "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."