From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Happy Birthday, Liberal Hippie Numbers Guy
I attribute my staggering ignorance on money matters to a few things: sleeping through the one and only economics course I took in college (although I remember the prof reeked of White Owl cigars), bonking my head on my household debt ceiling too many times, and generally fainting at the sight of charts. So all I can say is thank gawd Paul Krugman is around to explain economics in a way I can actually understand.
"Good evening, Mr. Bond.
I've been expecting you."
Krugman (aka
Krgthulu): Princeton professor and soon-to-be
CUNY professor. Defender of Keynes. Winner of the
Nobel Prize in Economics.
New York Times columnist and dirty fucking hippie
blogger. Best-selling
author. Netroots Nation
attendee. And most recently, he performed the public service of reducing irrelevant polysyllabic fossil George Will's vapid arguments to rubble enough times on Sunday morning
This Week roundtable discussions that
Will fled to Fox News faster than that Yanukoych guy jet-packed it to Russia. He darn well may win a second Nobel Prize for wanker slaying.
Paul is also someone who happily wears his ideology on his green eyeshades:
Good read!
Modern conservatism is actually a deeply radical movement, one that is hostile to the kind of society we’ve had for the past three generations---that is, a society that, acting through the government, tries to mitigate some of the ‘common hazards of life’ through such programs as Social Security, unemployment insurance, Medicare and Medicaid.
I believe in a relatively equal society, supported by institutions that limit extremes of wealth and poverty. I believe in democracy, civil liberties, and the rule of law. That makes me a liberal, and I’m proud of it.
Today is the 22nd anniversary of Paul's 39th birthday. In the C&J tradition, we wish him many blessings on his camels. And also many more years of driving conservatives crazy with the weapon they fear most: the liberal truth. Or, as it's better known: the truth.
Your west coast-friendly edition of Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Friday, February 28, 2014
Note: Just a heads-up that there will be no C&J on Monday because sometimes I feel the need to keep you people in line by using the withholding of love as a weapon. It was either that or this bomb. Back Tuesday with HUGS!!!
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15 days!!!
By the Numbers:
Days 'til daylight saving time kicks in:
9
Days 'til the
San Diego Festival of Science & Engineering:
15
Detroit's rank, with 6½ feet of snow and 100 days below the freezing mark, on the "winter weather misery index":
#1
The last year Detroit's winter was as harsh:
1950
(Source: National Weather Service)
Number of vehicles in Consumer Reports' top ten vehicles of 2014 that are made by, respectively, Japan, Germany, USA and South Korea:
5, 2, 2, 1
Percent increase in new home purchases in January, the highest in 5 years:
9.6%
(Source: Commerce Department)
Length and weight of a Twinkie if it represented this morning's sample of psychokinetic energy in the New York area:
35-feet, 600 pounds
(Source:
Egon Spengler)
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NEW! Michele Bachmann Departure Countdown
Michele Bachmann and her googly eyes leave Congress in 309 days. Please plan your champagne purchases accordingly.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Ever seen a panda puppy? Now you have…
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The giant broccoli stalk on the right enjoys
haunting the dreams of George H.W. Bush.
CHEERS to eating words. In yet another victory for First Lady Michelle Obama's vicious crusade to put the freedom-loving plus-size apparel industry out of business, the FDA has launched an attack on misinformation by
updating nutrition labels on food packaging. Among the improvements: more realistic serving sizes, less emphasis on "calories from fat" and more emphasis on sugar content. And to get Republicans to participate in the new initiative, junk food will be labeled, "Barack Hussein Obama Wants You To Eat This," and the healthy foods will be labeled, "Barack Hussein Obama Doesn’t Want You To Eat This." Too easy.
JEERS to The Terminator in earmuffs. Maine Teapublican Governor Paul LePage is a hothead of limited intelligence, which means he's prone to doing things like herding state labor officials into his mansion and suggesting---[wink wink]---that they should try to screw the unemployed harder by ignoring the facts in hearings and leaning in favor of poor defenseless businesses:
"Stick this in the
moochers' eyes!"
David Webbert, an employment attorney who last year called for the federal inquiry, said the findings are thorough and “damning.” … “The major finding is that the governor and his political appointees were improperly interfering with what’s supposed to be a judicial-like process,” Webbert said. “Being elected governor doesn’t mean that you’re all-powerful and that you get to control every decision. We have this thing called checks and balances.”
Says one commenter at the
Portland Press Herald site: "You guys have Richard Nixon up there." Yeah, and he can't board a helicopter for the last time fast enough.
CHEERS to helping hands. Happy Peace Corps Week! The organization that Kennedy built turns 53 tomorrow, and it's still crankin' out the good works:
President Kennedy greets
Peace Corps volunteers.
Peace Corps volunteers travel to the farthest corners of the world where they work toward sustainable change while gaining hands-on experience and developing the skills employers are looking for now more than ever. Volunteers who serve with the Peace Corps return home with a global perspective as well as cross-cultural, leadership, community development and language skills. They give back to their communities here at home and enrich the lives of those around them, helping to strengthen international ties and increase our country’s global competitiveness.
Fifty-three years later, it's still "The toughest job you'll ever love." Especially if you bring a few cases of Bacardi along. And limes. Without limes it's intolerable.
JEERS to 60 months of fringe. And a one, and a two…
Crappy birthday to you [twitch twitch]
Crappy birthday to you [twitch twitch]
Crappy birthday, tea party
Crappy birthday to you [twitch twitch]
Now bend over for your spanking.
Yes, the Tea Party has been treading on truth, common sense, and normal people
for five years as of yesterday. Amazing. They don’t look a day over a two-year-old.
Mercy Hospital, Mt. Vernon, Ohio.
Birthplace of Bill in Portland Maine
and site of his first restraining order.
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CHEERS to the swingiest swing state in all of Swingdom. I was hatched at Mercy Hospital in Mount Vernon, Ohio in August of 1964, and that makes me a dyed-in-the-wool Buckeye. (Here in Maine I'll always be considered "from away.") So it goes without saying that today I'm wishing a HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my
home state, which turns 211 years young tomorrow. Seven mostly-crappy presidents hail from Ohio (four died in office), and you all wisely stopped nominating us after Harding kicked the bucket. It's the only state whose flag is a pennant. And we're the proud birthplace of Steven Spielberg, Neil Armstrong, John Glenn, Orville Wright, Clark Gable, Gloria Steinem and
one or two others. Oh, and in the interest of fairness I should also mention that some people say Nebraska was also admitted to the union on tomorrow's date in 1867. Can't say I'm familiar with it, but I'll take 'em at their word.
"Hello, gorgeous..."
CHEERS to home vegetation. March is gonna start out colder than Dick Cheney's soul tomorrow, so ample couch-potato time is on our weekend schedule. On HBO's
Real Time, Bill Maher kibitzes with author Christopher Leonard ("The Meat Racket"), Bruce Dern, Margaret Hoover, Bill Kristol and Austan Goolsbee. New DVD releases include Oscar nominees Gravity and Nebraska, plus the cute Hemsworth brother in the latest
Thor flick. The NBA schedule
is here and the NHL schedule
is here. On
Bill Moyers & Company,
Dog Whistle Politics author Ian Haney López talks about, um, dog whistle politics. Lena Dunham ("Girls") hosts SNL. Then Ellen DeGeneres ends the weekend on a high note when she hosts
the 86th Academy Awards. My money's on
12 Years A Slave, McConaughey, Leto, Blanchett and Nyong'o. But the main reason I'm watching, as always, is because it features one of my favorite sights: naked men dipped in gold.
And on that note, here's your Sunday morning lineup. Please hold your applause until Herman Cain becomes president:
Meet the Press: Conservative senators Claire McCaskill (D-MO) and Saxby Chambliss (R-GA); Conservative Rep. Raúl Labrador (R-ID), conservative Chuck Todd, conservative Kathleen Parker and Brit Tina Brown.
Kossack Nate Silver predicts
"Space Chimps III" will win the
Best Picture Oscar Sunday night.
This Week: Ben Affleck on the mess in the Congo; Nate Silver handicaps the Oscars; roundtable with Rep. Adam Kinzinger (R-IL), Van Jones, Rich Lowry and Cokie Roberts.
Face the Nation: Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel on thinning the military herd and seceding from America's 51st state, Afghanistan; Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY); roundtable with Michael O'Hanlon (Brookings), Danielle Pietka (AEI), Margaret Brennan and David Martin (CBS).
CNN's State of the Union: Google Santorum rags on blah people and brah people and gah people; roundtabloe with Amy Waltah, Bill Burtah and Ross Douthah.
Fox GOP Talking Points Sunday: Oh, Roger Ailes, you're so cute when you're beating a dead non-scandal. The GOP network invites Darrell Issa to shout "Benghazi!" and "IRS intimidation!" one more time, just in case there's a geezer or two watching who might still drool when they hear those prattle cries; Sen. Rob Portman (R-OH) and Rep. Chris Van Hollen (D-MD) talk budget numberzzzzz…; roundtable with George Will, Scott Bqhatevwr, Elise Viebeck and Evan Bayh.
Happy viewing!
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Five years ago in C&J: February 28, 2009
CHEERS to a really smooth ride. In Utah a man took his SUV to the garage so the service guys could figure out why the fuel gauge never went below half-full. Turns out the gas tank was filled with 35 pounds of plastic-wrapped pot. The owner says that probably also explains why the SUV tended to run better on Cheetos.
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And just one more…
True Fact: March 1
is National Pig Day.
CHEERS to March! Hell, it's close enough, so let's usher it in C&J-style with the upcoming highlights of the month that will soon erupt into
madness: Coming in like a lion, Daylight Saving Time, International Women's Day, St. Patrick's Day, Worship of Tools Day (not sure if they mean the screwdriver or the Ted Cruz variety), Something-on-a-Stick Day, the infamous Ides, Spring, the 2014 enrollment deadline for Obamacare…and then, lord willing, it'll go out like a lamb. I also believe March is one of the months of the year in which members of the House tea party caucus act like total jerks, the others being January, February, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November and December. Plus: as of today we've made it through one-sixth of 2014. Slap another gold star on your tuckus and...
Forward!
Have a great weekend. To show my appreciation for your support, I'm leaving a bowl of pudding under your pillow tonight. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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