From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Is Maine's Governor Running or Fleeing for Office?
The race for governor here in Maine is proving to be less Democrat vs. Republican and more Democrat vs. lily-livered coward.
Gov. LePage (l) won't debate unless
opponents stop telling the truth about him.
Twelve days ago our current embarrassment, Paul LePage, told his chauffer to crank up
Foggy Mountain Breakdown, put the pedal to the metal, and
whisk him away from an energy forum moments before it started when he "learned" that, as per rules agreed to by his staff weeks before the event, Democrat Mike Michaud would share the stage with him. It was curious, since LePage loves to crow about his energy policy:
Drill Frack Drill Frack Drill Drill Frack.
This week LePage got wobbly-kneed again, and threatened to pull out of every debate scheduled between now and the election---six in all. His reason: a group supporting Mike Michaud is being mean by telling the truth:
In a statement released by his campaign, the governor said he may back out because an outside group working to elect Michaud accused LePage of describing Social Security and Medicaid as forms of welfare.
LePage, see, is on a crusade to tar the poors in Maine as deadbeats and moochers---a classic tea party maneuver---so he can cut and slash the safety net up here until it hangs by a single thread. So anything he can throw the "welfare" label on is peachy with him. Unfortunately, he and his staff grabbed hold of an unfavorable federal economic report and bashed it, failing to realize it contained a couple third-rails of politics:
[F]ive other New England states appeared to grow faster than income in Maine because the report included in its definition of income “personal transfer receipts,” the term for how the government classifies benefits it administers, including Medicaid, Social Security, and tax-breaks and subsidies administered through the Obamacare health exchanges.
“It doesn’t matter what liberals call these payments, it is welfare, pure and simple,” LePage said in the statement.
It was hilarious because Governor Meathead was out of the country when they issued the press release, and it took forever for his disheveled staff to go into damage control mode. Seniors were especially pissed, having just read that he was snidely calling their Social Security and Medicaid "welfare"
in writing. AARP
tore into him at the time:
“Calling Social Security and [Medicaid] 'welfare' is not only inaccurate, it is offensive to the hundreds of thousands of Mainers who have paid into these programs all their working lives.”
Michaud, seen here not being afraid of the truth.
It was a huge cluster-you-know-what, and now LePage is threatening to hole himself up in the Blaine House 'til November because supporters of Mike Michaud have the audacity to remind voters what a jerk the incumbent is. Methinks
the ad is doing some damage.
Chip in a few bucks for Mike Michaud. He'll be a terrific governor. He's itchin' to expand Medicaid. He's eager to raise the minimum wage. And he ain't no coward.
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, September 24, 2014
Note: You apostrophe d be correct if you guessed that it apostrophe s National Punctuation Day period And you know what question mark I think it apostrophe s great ampersand noble that it apostrophe s got its own day period As I always say comma quotation marks A day without punctuation is like a day without sunshine exclamation point quotation marks Can I get an Amen question mark
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9 days!!!
By the Numbers:
Days 'til Halloween:
37
Days 'til the 28th annual
North Carolina Seafood Festival in Morehead City:
9
Number of same-sex couples who have gotten married over the last ten years in America:
250,000
(Source: Census Bureau)
Percent of Republican parents in 1960 and today, respectively, who would be upset if their child married a Democrat:
5%, 49%
(Source:
Vox)
Median age in the United States:
37
Median age of major broadcast network viewers:
54
(Source:
The Washington Post)
Percent chance that the conservative star chamber known as ALEC is "literally lying" about climate change:
100%
(Source:
Google)
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Mid-week Rapture Index: 186 (including 3 date settings and 1 Satanic Children's Big Book of Activities). Soul Protection Factor 8 lotion is recommended if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Who needs a rake?
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CHEERS to the most important story of the day. After taking a year off, South Park returns tonight. It would appear that a certain character isn’t respecting someone's authoritah (and this clip actually ran during the Washington game last Sunday)…
10pm. Comedy Central. Sweeeeet.
Project! From the diaphragm!
CHEERS to a little chat with the world. It's showtime! Two days after Barack Obama and his coalition of the willing (one of which regularly beheads people, which is a bit awkward) ordered airstrikes on the evildoers, and one day after giving a
terrific speech on climate change, the president will address the United Nations General Assembly this morning. He'll talk about both subjects, I'm sure, and I have an idea which one the news will fixate on more. I have little advice to give him, but I hear that if you bang your shoe on the lectern it'll increase your gravitas. Good luck.
P.S. Hey ISIS! What happened to your super-awesome cutting-edge video stream with Go-Pro 9.0 and 3-D enhancements set to a beeyotchin' hip-hop beat for maximum appeal to today's youth market? For some strange reason all I'm getting is static. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!
CHEERS to Year 5775. Rosh Hashanah begins tonight sundown, so let me be the first to say, "Shana Tova", but without a Times Square ball drop:
Bonus: this year is a palindrome.
The only similarity between the Jewish New Year and the secular one is: Many people use the New Year as a time to make "resolutions." Likewise, the Jewish New Year is a time to begin looking back at the mistakes of the past year and planning the changes to be made in the new year. … Rosh Hashana begins a 10 day period, known as Aseret Ymay Tshuva, (Ten Days of Repentance) or Yomim Nora'im (High Holy days). These ten days that end with Yom Kippur, are a time for Tshuva (repentance), Tefilla (prayer) andTzedaka (charity).
Even though the C&J household is just a run-'o-the-mill lapsed-Episcopalian/lapsed-Catholic train wreck, we'll still take a moment to blow a ram's horn outside our neighbor's bedroom window at 3am. We figure, why break with our normal routine just because it's Rosh Hashanah?
JEERS to Kris Kobach. Let's check in with the Kansas Secretary of state, who has botched every attempt so far to force Democrats to place someone on the ballot so it won't be just Republican Senator Pat Roberts versus a popular independent and likely caucuser with Democrats:
[Whiff!]
[Whiff!]
[Whiff!]
I'm starting to understand now why his parents didn’t remove his training wheels until he was 30.
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Gong! Gong!! BuddaBuddaBudda… GONG!!!
This is another edition of The One Word Answer Man. Over at TPM Sahil Kapur asks: Is This The Weirdest, Creepiest Ad Of The 2014 Election Cycle?
Possibly.
Now back to Cheers and Jeers.
Gong! Gong!! BuddaBuddaBudda… GONG!!!
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I'm not sure exactly who won the 1,000
Netroots swag bags, but...lucky YOU!
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CHEERS to splintered auction paddles. Wow---just shy of $6,000 was raised in the 2014
Netroots Nation Annual Online Auction, which came to a loud, brutish and frenzied conclusion last night. Thanks to everyone who checked out the goods and tossed in a bid or two. The money will go towards keeping the 2015 convention registration fee lower than it otherwise would be, and also help offset the costs of the regional events and mentoring program. I'm also pleased to announce that this year only six people were sent to the hospital during the bidding war over the clues to the next pub quiz. Good to see we're becoming more civilized in our old age.
CHEERS to the Environment President. On this date in 1906, Theodore Roosevelt signed a bill designating Devils Tower---that kewl rock formation in Wyoming---as the country's first National Monument. Some people call it America's national nipple:
Caution: don''t show that photo to a fracker or he'll start drooling on you.
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Five years ago in C&J: September 24, 2009
JEERS to the party of "Waaahhh." Message from conservatives to Americans (including millions of conservative ones) living under our draconian health insurance system: DROP DEAD:
Stay classy, GOP.
[O]pponents of government-run healthcare are laying the groundwork for lawsuits to stall and eventually kill any Democratic legislative victory---just in case. A broad group of conservatives has begun to explore how to file such lawsuits, who would file them, and what components of the legislation would be challenged, if not all of it. ... Sources say the suits will also be filed in most states and in as many courts as possible to avoid putting all eggs "in just a few baskets."
Three observations: One, the insurance industry has no conscience. Two, the Republican party is scared shitless that healthcare reform will marginalize them even further. And three: See one and two.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to the day the Straight Talk Express jumped the tracks. It happened six years ago today, and it's become a high holy day on the American political calendar. It started when John McCain kinda-sorta but not really suspended his presidential campaign so he could ride to Washington on a white stallion to stop the economic collapse, a much-mocked effort that consisted of a perfunctory appearance at the Bush White House. But that half-baked stunt quickly faded into the background when, with Keith Olbermann sitting beside him as a witness to history, David Letterman delivered the coup de grâce after catching McCain in a pasty-faced lie:
"Hey John, I got a question! Ya need a ride to the airport?"
Today Barack Obama is in the Oval Office serving out his second term, and McCain is just another obstructionist senator whose closest buddies are the Sunday talk show hosts. Thank you, Dave, for being so sharp that night. But more important: Thank you, John, for being so dumb that night.
Have a nice Wednesday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
What a doofus Bill in Portland Maine is.
---brooklynbadboy
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