If we claim we value diversity, why do so many of us shut down when faced with ideas, opinions and beliefs that seem to be opposed to our own? Does our appreciation for diversity end at the color of our skin? Does it end with sexual preference, or cats vs. dogs? Seriously, if we claim to value diversity, we really need to learn to accept that other people will have ideas, opinions and beliefs which are opposed to ours, and we need to be able to tolerate them without shutting down. We don’t have to agree with ideas that oppose our own, but unless we learn to accept that other people’s experiences, capabilities, and sensory feedback lead them to conclusions that are different than ours, we are destined to suffer dearly.
Good evening and welcome to Monday Group Meditation. We will be sitting from 7:30 to 11:00 PM Eastern Time. It is not necessary to sit for the entire extended time, which is set up to make it convenient for people in four North American Time Zones; sit for as long as you like and when it is most convenient for you. Monday Group Meditation is open to everyone, believers and non-believers, who are interested in gathering in silence. If you are new to meditation and would like to try it for yourself, Mindful Nature gave a good description of one way to meditate in an earlier diary, copied and pasted below:
"It is a matter of focusing attention mostly. In many traditions, the idea is to sit and focus on the rising and falling of the breath. Not controlling it, but sitting in a relaxed fashion and merely observing experiences of breathing, sounds, etc. Be aware of your thoughts, but don't engage in them. When your mind wanders (it will, often), then return to focus on breath and repeat."
Sangha Co-hosts for meditation are:
7:30 - 10:00 Ooooh and davehouck
9:30 - 11:00 thanatokephaloides
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Considering topics that are nearly guaranteed to result in pie fights here on DKos, Obama sux/rox, Hillary sux/rox, God exists or does not, these three come immediately to mind, but in the greater world think of all the violent disagreement between Republicans and Democrats, Liberals and Conservatives, and the extremes on the right and left between the Establishment Right and Left. It seems that people have become so averse to the quality of contrast in life that we are nearly completely unable to tolerate one another unless our views are significantly in agreement. It appearss we lack the emotional maturity necessary to be able to tolerate one another.
People universally on both the Right and Left say they dislike the polarization that is endemic in our culture, however this lack of emotional maturity is one of the reasons it is so pervasive. We can see from the examples above, polarization is not just a problem between Conservatives and Liberals, it is also evident in the frequent pie fights that appear on the front page here. It is not enough to have goals in common. If we are going to get along, if we value peace, we need to learn to accept and tolerate ideas and beliefs different than our own.
We criticize Congress for their childish behavior and inability to compromise, but if we are being honest with ourselves it becomes clear that in some ways we seem to behave in similar fashion in our own lives; perhaps the stories are different, but if we avoid having anything to do with people who are significantly different than us, if we avoid our family members who are conservative for example, we are a part of the problem. If we really look at ourselves deeply, in just what ways do we find we are intolerant or uncompromising?
No doubt the regulars who populate this Monday evening place have done significant work, and are no longer so identified with thought. Developing emotional maturity is, after all, one outcome of following a spiritual path; so it is possible we are not so ideologically attached. But for some people who are completely identified with thought, the very idea that they could be wrong is an attack on their very existence. For them the very idea of being wrong threatens annihilation, and turns ideologically opposed people into their enemy.
It would be good for us, good for the ideologically attached people and in fact good for the entire world, for those of us who are able to reach out to people who are ideologically opposed to us and establish relationships with them. We don’t have to make them our best friends, but it is good for both them and us to have the opportunity to remind ourselves that in spite of our differences, we still have much in common.
Perhaps at the very least we can try to remember how deeply that kind of attachment leads to suffering, and that although it seems we all inhabit the same physical reality, we each are having a very different experience. Some of us grew up in loving families, while others did not. Some of us had every advantage in life, while other had to struggle for everything. Some have soaring intellects, while others’ cognitive skills are are less facile. If we haven’t learned how we can be driven by our emotional reactions, then all of our cognitive processes are compromised by our emotions, no matter how intelligent we are.
Perhaps we might also remember that we are each viewing a narrow band of physical reality, through the same five senses, but in each individual the senses are tuned differently leading to wildly different experiences of life. The world is filled with infinite sensory stimuli, and each one of us is paying attention to only what we are drawn to personally.
At the very least we can accept that we all struggle with the same human challenges, it is a constant trial to remain balanced. We all face joy and hardship, we all love our families and want them to be happy and healthy. Even if we are not sufficiently developed to feel comfortable reaching out in this fashion we can accept that in ourselves, and remember all of this to help ourselves soften towards them.
If we can reach out, perhaps by showing that we actually can tolerate contrast we can help others learn to do the same. Perhaps we might help people to stop perceiving as enemies their neighbors, their brothers and sisters, the person ahead them in the checkout line at the grocery store, simply because their ideas, opinions or beliefs may differ. Perhaps we might be able to show by our examples that while our beliefs, ideas and opinions might be diametrically opposed, we can still respect one another, we can talk and be friendly with one another, and we can still help and care for one another. We really do have the ability to work in our own environment towards collapsing the polarization we see all around us, simply by learning and demonstrating the ability to tolerate contrast.