GUS (Gave Up Smoking) is a community support diary for Kossacks in the midst of quitting smoking. Any supportive comments, suggestions or positive distractions are appreciated. If you are quitting or even just thinking of quitting, please join us! We kindly ask that politics be left outside. You can also click the GUS tag to view all diary posts, or access the GUS Library (the archived version for now).
Want to make sure you never miss us? Follow (♥) the GUS tag to keep GUS in your Stream and easily find the link to the latest one. It's just that easy!
A message to ALL quitters (and would-be quitters): You don't have to avoid GUS if you have a failed quit. We won't give you a bad time or nag you. We consider the failed quits as "practice" for the real quit.
Most of us in this little corner of the internet are pretty giving souls. We're quick to sympathize with folks who are struggling and generous with our time and resources when someone we know (and even some we don't know) need a helping hand. Hey, what are you gonna do? We're Liberals. It's kind of our thing. But we're humans, first, and humans are born with an altruistic streak; it's in our nature to help.
We're often quick to offer help or pitch in when something needs doing or someone needs cheering...it seems easy to help others. But for a lot of us, asking for help when we need it is a whole different ball game. People who are generous to a fault have trouble even considering an offer of help when the situation arises. It's somehow easier to give than it is to receive, and we don't always sense the disconnect there. If we're all in this together, why shouldn't it be easy to accept support when it's our turn?
For a lot of us, it's not.
It was hard for me to accept help when I was younger, never mind ask for it (the horrors!). I was independent to a fault; it played a huge part in my self-image and identity. I wouldn't think twice about helping someone else, but when I was struggling and it became clear I couldn't handle something on my own, could I muster up the courage to ask for help?
Oh, HELL no!
In fact, the thought of it made me squirm. Part of me was all "I should be able to do this by myself!" A smaller, more wounded part of me was wondering "...why would anyone want to help me?" I didn't want to admit vulnerability, or weakness, or incompetence (never mind that asking for help doesn't actually do ANY of those things...it takes guts to realize and admit you need a helping hand sometimes!).
I didn't realize when I was quitting smoking over a decade ago (Cold Turkey, on my own) how having someone in my corner---someone like the folks here at GUS---would have made the whole process easier, even if it was just to reassure me that I wasn't going nuts and that I would make it through to the other side. I might have saved myself a lot of grief and worry and self-doubt if I'd just admitted that I didn't have to go it alone.
Y'know, the older I get, the easier it is to admit I need help with things sometimes.
Maybe I don't care as much how I come across to people now.
Maybe I realize I've already proved a thousand times over that I'm a strong person who is there for other people, and that the law of averages suggests that I might also need some help on occasion. We all do.
So ask yourself: what's the worst thing that could happen if I actually said what I needed or accepted help that was offered? You don't have to go it alone. You can be a helper AND accept help when you need it; it's not either/or. It may not always work out, and it may feel a little weird at first, but hey---it can't hurt to ask!
Speaking of selfless, community-minded helper types, there's a Daily Kos Community Quilt being made for one of our own GUS Buddies, Common Sense Mainer. Show the love (even if you don't have the spare cash---some folks are donating extra)!
Who's your little buddy?
1BQ, 2thanks, 3rdGenFeminist, 417els, A Man Called Gloom, Abra Crabcakeya, Actbriniel, addisnana, AfroPonix, aishmael, Alise, Alpha99, also mom of 5, ambeeeant, American in Kathmandu, amk for obama, andsarahtoo, angry marmot, Anne933, anodnhajo, aoeu, AoT, aquarius2001, arcadesproject, Archie2227, arodb, Arthur Wolf (in memoriam), assyrian64, Aunt Acid, awkawk, b4uknowit, BadKitties, bamablue, BARAKABETH, barnowl, b barrie, bdizz, beatpanda, beefydaddy18, betterdemsonly, BFSkinner, bgblcklab1, BigAlinWashSt, Bike Crash, BirderWitch, BJKay, bleeding heart, blingbling65, blue husky, Blue Intrigue, bluedust, BluejayRN, BlueJessamine, BlueMississippi, Bluerall, bluestatedem84, BoiseBlue, Boston Beans, boudi08, Brahman Colorado, breedlovinit, BrenP, BrianParker14, Bronxist, broths, BrowniesAreGood, bsmechanic, Buckeye Nut Schell, buddabelly, Bugsydarlin, bumbi, BusyinCA, cactusgal, cagernant, Carol in San Antonio, CathiefromCanada, CathodeRay, CDH in Brooklyn, Cedwyn (in memorium), cee4, Cen Den, ChocolateChris, Christy1947, ChurchofBruce, ciganka, cinnamondog, citizenx, ClapClapSnap, claude, Cleante, Code Monkey, codobus, Coldblue Steele, Colorado is the Shiznit, coloradomomma, common green, Common Sense Mainer, congenitalefty, coppercelt, CwV, dadanation, Damnit Janet, dangoch, DarienComp, dauber, Dauphin, Dave in AZ, David54, deedogg, deha, demkat620, Dexter, Diana in NoVa, Dickie, DiegoUK, Dingodude, dirtdude, distraught, djMikulec, docreed2003, dolfin66, donnamarie, Donna O, dotsright, Dr Teeth, Dreggas, DRo, droogie6655321, Dube, duckhunter, Eclectablog, Eddie C, EdgedInBlue, edr, effervescent, elbamash, El barragas, el vasco, electricgrendel, entrelac, ericlewis0, Everest42, Ex Con, exiledfromTN, exlrrp, ExpatGirl, ezdidit, fat old man, fauve, fhamme, Fineena, fiona2, fishhawk, Flea, flumptytail, Friend of the court, fritzi56, FrugalGranny, Garrett, Gator, gchaucer2, GDbot, Geiiga, GenXangster, glpaul, gooderservice, gooners, Gordon20024, gravlax, GreenMountainBoy02 (in memoriam), greylox, grndrush (in memoriam), GrumpyWarriorPoet, GuerillaLiberal, GulfExpat, gzodik, Haningchadus14, Haole in Hawaii, HappyinNM, henlesloop, here4tehbeer, HeyMikey, hideinplainsight, High Tide, hiliner68, history first, hold tight, Homers24, Hugh Jim Bissell, hulibow, I love OCD, I said GOOD DAY sir, Illinois IRV, Im a frayed knot, imisa, Indexer, indubitably, indyada, Interceptor7, Inventor, Isaacsdad, ItsaMathJoke, itsbenj, itsjim, Jahiz, James Earl, JamesEB, janl1776, Janeo, jarbyus, jayjaybear, jbalazs, JBL55, jbou, Jeffersonian Democrat, jillwklausen, jmadlc55, jmonch, Joes Steven (aka Steven), john keats, john07801, johngoes, johnny wurster, jsfox, just another vet, JVolvo's Mom (in memoriam), jwinIL14, Kai99, kailuacaton, Kamakhya, kat herder, katchen, Kelly of PA, khloemi, Khun David, Kitsap River, kittania, kos, KrazyKitten, Kristina40, Ksholl, labwitchy, ladypockt, Lahdee, LamontCranston, langerdang, LarsThorwald, LA rupert, last starfighter, LaughingPlanet, Laurie Gator, Lava20, Leo in NJ, LiberalVol, lightarty, Limelite, Lipstick Liberal, litoralis, lmdonovan, lockewasright, Lonely Liberal in PA, Lonely Texan, longislandny, Lorinda Pike, LtdEdishn, lunacat, lunachickie, luvsathoroughbred, lying eyes, maggiemay, magicsister, mango, Marc in KS, MargaretPOA, Marjmar, Mark E Andersen (Kodiak54), marknspokane, marsanges, maryabein, Matf, Matt Esler, Maxiemax, maybeeso in michigan, MBNYC, mdemploi, Meteor Blades, Micburke, michael1104, MillieNeon, minerva1157, MinervainNH, Missys Brother, Miz Trom, mjbleo, MnRaindog (in memoriam), mntleo2, mollyd, Mopshell, Morague, MotoGP, Mr Bojangles, mrsgoo, mskitty, msmacgyver, MsWings, Murphoney, nannyboyz, Naturalized Texan, ncsuLAN, NearlyNormal, Nedsdag, Nespolo, Nick Zouroudis, NinetyWt, nokkonwud, NotGeorgeWill, notgivingup, NY brit expat, occupystephanie, oceanview, Ole Texan, OleHippieChick, Olkate, one pissed off democrat, One Pissed Off Liberal, Onomastic, operculum, OrangeMike, Ordvefa, Overseas, Over the Edge, Pager, paige, PaintyKat, paj1, palmer18, paradox, parryander, paulitics, peglyn, Pennsylvanian, Penny GC, phrogge prince, plok, Portia Elm, Positronicus, post rational, PowWowPollock, Proud Mom and Grandma, psycho liberal, ptolemynm, puckmtl, Purple Priestess, PvtJarHead, Qwisp, racheltracks, Radiowalla, randallt, ray bob, real world chick, red mittens, Reepicheep, regis, relentless, revelwoodie, revsue, Rex Manning, rexymeteorite, RiaD (in memoriam), rickeagle, ridemybike, rightiswrong, Rileycat, rincewind, riverlover, rkex, roadlion, RoCali, Roger Fox, Rosebuddear, roses, rscopes, Rudini, RumsfeldResign, Safina, SallyCat, Sanuk, Sark Svemes, sboucher, scooter in brooklyn, Scrapyard Ape, seenaymah, Senor Unoball, sewaneepat, sfbob, sgary, Shahryar, sheddhead, shesaid, Shifty18, shmuelman, shopkeeper, shortgirl, sidious666, sidnora, slksfca, slowbutsure, smartcookienyc, smeesq, Smoh, snoopydawg, snorwich, SnyperKitty, SoCalHobbit, SoCalSal, sofia, soonergrunt, sostos, sowsearsoup, SpecialKinFlag, spmozart, spotDawa, SpotTheCat, StateOfGrace, Statusquomustgo, stiffneck, stonekeeper, suesue, sunbro, Super Grover, susans, swampyankee, Syoho, tallmom, tarkangi, Tay, tdslf1, teknospaz, The Eyewitness Muse, The grouch, The Technomancer, The Termite, theatre goon, TheGeneral, TheStoopingRabbit, tigerdog, TigerMom, Tim DeLaney, tiredofcrap, TomP, tonyahky, Toyotabob7, TracieLynn, TreeFrog, triciawyse, tripodisblack, trs, trueblueliberal, TrueBlueMajority, ttanner, Tulsonian, Turn VABlue, Turtle Bay, Tyto Alba, uc booker, UncleCharlie, Unduna, Unforgiven, ursoklevar, USArmyParatrooper, VA02 femocrat, Vacationland, valadon, Vayle, vc2, Vetwife, vgranucci, Via Chicago, Village expects idiot home soon, viral, vulcangrrl, waytac, webranding, Wee Mama, weelzup, Wes Opinion, Whimsical Rapscallion, willy be frantic, willy mugobeer, Wood Dragon, wolfie1818, Wordsinthewind, Wreck Smurfy, x, xopher, YellowDogInGA, yet another liberal, Zotz
Have you had some experience with the effects of smoking, and want to write a GUS diary or host an open thread? Please sign up in the Butt Can (Tip Jar), and name the day and time that works for you. The weekly GUS Diary Schedule is below, with regular hosts in bold. There's an open slot just calling your name!
Wed PM: Vacationland (Here Today, But I Won't Be Next Week!)
Thu AM: Portia Elm (anodnhajo on hiatus)
Fri AM: flumptytail
Fri PM: Open
Sat AM: Open
Sat PM: Open
Sun AM: gchaucer2
Sun PM: Open
Mon AM: Portia Elm
Mon PM: Open
Tue AM: gchaucer2
Tue PM: Open
Wed AM: Open
If you can spare a few hours, please consider hosting GUS. It doesn't have to be a permanent slot; it can be a one-time deal or just an open thread! Not sure where to start? Just ask for help in the Butt Can (Tip Jar). Seriously, it doesn't have to include specific elements or require all sorts of fabulous diary formatting skills. The regulars will make sure stuff gets carried over from diary to diary, so if you want to just tell your story or provide an open thread and host for a few hours, that's cool too. You do not need to be perfect, you do not need to become a regular, and you would make some quitters very happy.