I read a classic diary on this site today, about White Privilege. I then started to read the comments. One white woman with disabilities commented that she had taken an online test that had rated her as not privileged, but that the online test was obviously wrong because she knew that she had white privilege. I think this is a false assumption. I believe that one can be underprivileged in multiple areas that leave one with net underprivileged status even though one has white privilege. Yes she and I would have even more strikes against us if we were also black or another type of POC. But not all people with white privilege are "privileged" when you consider the whole picture.
I have white privilege. The classic diary written Wed Aug 20, 2014 entitled "I Finally 'Get' White Privilege and I'm Sorry by pajoly is a more important diary than this diary and much better written than this diary.
Pajoly's diary is the best explanation I have ever heard of white privilege, and yes there is no doubt in my mind that I have white privilege. After reading this diary I am feeling that white privilege in my gut for the first time, not just knowing it with my mind. I am feeling the sense of why affirmative action is essential in my gut for the first time, not just knowing it with my mind. I don't just know that white privilege exists, I get what white privilege feels like in my life, and why it matters to me every day, and why not having it would matter to me every day. In some ways the daily not having white privilege must be the most wearing part of discrimination. Always having to be on guard to not do anything that might be mistaken for something alarming must be tiring, but not always being on guard can be suddenly fatal.
That said, being a short 65 year old woman with severe disabilities is not a net position of privilege. At least not for me. If I am not careful, I will be mistaken for a homeless drunk or drug user or person with mental health issues (or stroke victim if people are kind). Homelessness can sometimes result in kindness from strangers, but not if they think I am also drunk or high or weird in the head. I sometimes smell bad even after washing carefully and putting on clean clothes, from skin problems, bad teeth, intestinal upset, excessive sweating, and other things beyond my control. I have a few speech defects. I have diabetes and occasionally have sudden low blood sugar episodes. I have neurological deficits that sometimes result in sudden movements of various muscles, sometimes over and over that I cannot stop. I cannot smile evenly with both sides of my mouth, which is one of the more commonly recognized symptoms of stroke, and can have other less flattering causes. I drop things. I drool. Mostly my thinking brain still works pretty well and I can get As in graduate level courses at good universities. But that will be hard to transfer into job prospects and getting a job will be less difficult than keeping one with my physical problems. I may even be shot by a policeman who thinks that I am dangerous because I cannot obey his commands at all, let alone in a timely manner. At the moment I cannot drive, but even when I can I will be afraid to be driving while disabled, for good reason, knowing that I cannot easily get down on the ground by myself except by falling hard on the pavement and whatever trash and broken glass litters it, and I cannot get up from the ground by myself. I cannot put my hands together behind my back. I cannot even get out of a vehicle quickly. Yes, all these problems would be infinitely worse if I was also black. If I were also black, I would probably never try to drive again.
To function this well I require regular medication, and I have to jump through hoops to get it. I need time and money for medical care, and I need doctors who are knowledgeable enough to help me balance the combination of several medical problems, each of which is disabling and several of which are potentially fatal. Sometimes I have to tell the doctor "No I cannot follow the treatment plan that would in your opinion be best for treating the condition you are trying to treat, because it interferes for the treatment of other problems for which I have fewer options." I get accused of being an uncooperative patient for refusing treatment that could kill me, but because I don't want to die yet, I have to refuse that treatment. Sometimes that means that I have to find a new doctor, which is hard in a small community.
98 % of the time, my life is good in spite of that.
I have white privilege, which does improve my chance of surviving my disabilities, and makes my life easier than if everything was the same except that I was a POC. But that does not mean that taken as a whole, compared to the average standard of living in this country today, I am privileged. Compared to earlier human history, or compared to the worst parts of the world, I am privileged, but that is not the standard most people in this country are referring to when they say that someone is privileged or underprivileged.
And there are white people in this country who have it very much harder than I do, who suffer far more, and have far less with which to deal with their suffering.
Having white privileged is not the same as being privileged. We need to end white privilege by improving the situation for people of color until everyone has an equal place at the table, until everyone in this country has access to decent health care, enough to eat, safe shelter, adequate clothing, and a safe job available. We will still need people willing to choose to put their life on the line at work, fire fighters, military, etc. but that should be personal choice, not economic necessity. We need to reform our legal system, which is currently a disgrace (topic for another diary). We need to eliminate the death penalty except for treason, and place limitations on its use for treason. We need to incarcerate less people than most civilized nations, mostly only for repeat violent offenses, and the worst single violent offenses, the people that it is not and cannot be safe to leave in the general population of the country. Moderate single acts of violence can result in penalties that include monitoring location and suspension for a time of the right to own firearms or be in places where firearms are present, with incarceration for failing to comply with this. Many other important changes are still needed for everybody outside the 1%. And most of us of all colors are not privileged. We are not even adequately treated. The system is broken and needs deep systematic fixes, for everyone.