(Taking some liberties with time and place)
Megyn: Hey Rog – thanks for calling. That was quick.
Roger: Yeah Meg. I mean, great show, great ratings – we did great. Thanks to you and the guys, big time.
M: I think I handled Trump pretty good, too. See him squirm, there? And “Rosie O’Donnell!” Ha! Talk about desperate! Bet he wanted to be anywhere but Cleveland.
R: Yeah, Meg, that was good – tough questions, like we said. Real good. But listen, we need to talk.
M: Yeah, I know. But I’ve got show prep. Maybe in a day or two?
R: I don’t know, Meg. I mean, OK, but some things are gonna come out.
M: Come out? What do you mean?
R: Well, Donald’s got some nasty tweets.
M: Donald? You calling him Donald?
R: Yeah, well, you know, Trump. Some nasty tweets. I think he’s kinda pissed at you.
M: Yeah, good. I’m pissed at him. Asshole. You were right about ‘scratch him and he doesn’t just bleed, he shits.’ You were right. That was fun. Guy is too simple. Fun.
R: Look, Megyn, I know how you feel. And I feel the same, believe me. But he’s got a ton of power right now. Everything he says goes global. To be honest, I’ve got Rupert trying to reach me right now. And I’m avoiding him. I know it sounds crazy, after all I said, but it’s crazy – him, his kids. They’re – they’re kinda pissed.
M: Them, too. At us? For what?
R: Well, at you, right now.
M: FOR WHAT?
R: For being kind of rough with Donald.
M: What the hell? We talked about this. We talked about it for weeks. You didn’t want him on the show!
R: Yeah. No. You’re right, you’re right. But Rupert thinks he might have a chance. And no matter how you feel, or I feel, he’s really still the boss.
M: Pardon me, but he’s an old dithering fuck.
R: Well, yeah. But he’s a rich old fuck. And he’s still kind of our boss.
M: I thought you were gonna stand up to him? You said that a bunch of times.
R: I am. And I am. Just now isn’t the best time.
M: Why not?
R: Because he’s still... Look, Trump is pretty powerful. All the big guys are laying off him now. And I gotta tell you, that whole Luntz thing bombed. I mean, huge. Trump doesn’t like Luntz. Did you know that?
M: What are you talking about? He never liked Luntz.
R: Yeah, but now he’s making it real obvious. With tweets.
M: Tweets! What do you care about tweets?
R: Yeah, I know. But our viewers respond to tweets. They do. We found out.
M: So that means what, exactly?
R: Well, I’m thinking maybe you take a few days off. Full pay. Of course. Full pay.
M: What the BLOODY FUCK!?!
R: I’m sorry, Megs. But I’ve got a whole company to worry about here. And it’s gotten pretty nasty. I want to protect you. That’s what it’s about.
M: FROM WHAT?!?
R: From – from the fallout.
M: What are you talking about? Fallout from what? FROM WHAT??
R: Well, from Donald.
M: DONALD??! Who the hell cares about DONALD??!
R: Listen. I’ve got a company to worry about…
M: And? AND??!
R: It would be best if you took a couple days off.
M:
R: No big deal. Just a few days so this thing simmers down.
M:
R: Megyn? Megs?
M:
R: Not a big deal. But go on and have some fun. You’ve earned it. You deserve it. Please.
M:
R: Ok, let’s look at two weeks. That’s 10 business days. That’ll be great. We’ll all be refreshed by then. Think of us while you’re away, OK? You lucky dog. Just think of us. I’m hoping to get away, too, but probably not ‘til next year. So you have fun. OK?
M: