Just a few things I think that I know, over a life lived over four decade (nearly). I mainly wanted to get this down, if you don't consider this a diary, I understand, it's mainly me talking to the world about how I see it.
I know that I have two wonderful little boys who are no longer so little, and that scares me more than anything. Isaac is nearly seven, and Jude will be five next year. They are scary smart (and what dad doesn't say that?) and quick and funny and passionate and they scare the hell out of me. Someday they're going to be out in the world on their own, making their own decisions, living their own lives. But, if I do this parenting thing right, they'll make the right decisions, and have wonderful lives full of joy and, yes, sometimes pain. It's exciting seeing them turning into the men they will someday be, and they look to both be becoming very good men.
I know that my wife is my rock, my center, and no matter what happens, she will always have my back. I love planning our adventures, our somedays and our tomorrows with her, and I love to make her laugh. Just the best fucking laugh, man. I love giving her new books to read, authors I've been reading for thirty years, and seeing the characters come to life again in her imagination. More than once, after she's read a book or a series, I'll go back over it again and have a whole new appreciation for it.
I know that our country has come so far, and there is still so far to go. When I was a kid, in the eighties and and a teen in the nineties, there's no way I could have imagined this world. Gay people can get married? A black president? Hell, a computer that can fit in my pocket and access all of the information in the world? That's sci-fi shit, right there. I also never imagined a world where a crazy person would shoot up a kindergarten class full of kids and teachers, and that there would not be a national outcry to never, ever let it happen again. Sometimes, the country I love so much is so very, very awful.
I know that I get to vote, every four years, for the people who will be representing me and mine and yours and everyone in the entire country. People seem to think me old fashioned, but I can't imagine anything more thrilling that being able to vote. Isaac voted with me, when he was two months old, for Barack Obama in 2008, and both boys voted with me in 2012. I'm trying to teach them that there is no more important duty as a citizen of this country than to make your mark and vote your conscience. Not in so many words, but I like to think they're starting to get it.
And I know that, come what may, despite the darkness that sometimes threatens to overwhelm, there will always, always be sunlight. I may have to work extra hard right now, but at least I have a good, no, a great job, a union job, and my wife has a good job helping people. We can support ourselves, and our children and, when we can, we can help support people who don't have anything. And that, more than politics and pundits and fear and hate and bigotry, is what really matters.