Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump has precisely one core governing idea—all the others are negotiable. But the notion that what our new gilded age truly needs to be great is to close the current gap between government figures and the ultra-wealthy financiers of every election and lobbying effort by simply appointing the ultra-wealthy to government posts directly, cutting out all that dreadful inefficiency between what the wealthy want and how they get it? That is what Donald Trump brings to the table. He promises not just just serve the rich: he promises an administration operated by the wealthy themselves.
Because Donald Trump firmly believes that the rich are simply better than other Americans, better and smarter and more beautiful and all the other things that he goes on about, and we're not going to get anywhere as a nation unless these beautiful, brilliant blowhards touch their stubby little Midas fingers to every government desk and doorknob.
Forrest Lucas, co-founder of oil products company Lucas Oil and an outspoken opponent of animal rights, is a leading contender for Interior secretary should Donald Trump win the White House, say two sources familiar with the campaign’s deliberations.
This is a good idea, says approximately nobody in America who is not themselves (1) an oil company executive or (2) an "outspoken opponent of animal rights." Yes, who better to head the national efforts to ensure that not a single twig remains of our shared national lands tomorrow if a company can make a dollar today by stripping them bare?
If your grandchildren want to see wild animals, surely a wealthy benefactor will put their name to a future museum in which they can see a dozen or two skinned and stuffed examples. If your grandchildren want to visit a forest, surely the world's companies will by that point have introduced virtual reality goggles that let them see just that. Put a fan to your face, and feel the breeze; hang an air freshener around your neck, and take in the scents of Wild Prairie or National Park #2.
Donald Trump Jr., an avid hunter, has also publicly expressed interest in the job.
Oh, well there you go then. Let's have oil products company founder Forrest Lucas and Donald Trump Jr. fight it out for the position. Why the hell not.