Dear Vladymirror Poutine,
You will be happy to know I have talked to Rex, and as you instructed him, we are just leaving many of the key positions in the State Department vacant. I also appreciate your generous offer to withdraw your support for Assad, so we can come in and have an easy quick victory. I have made the orders. Invasion is imminent. Oh, and if you could just remind me, when was it you said you would withdraw support for Assad again?
Anyway, being president, it is so much harder than anyone thought it would have been. I did have to demote Steve...I had Mike Pence send you the documents from his AOL account, which I think make clear why, but you probably already know, haha!?
There’s this group, Vlady, called the House Freedom Caucus. Total losers. I told Rex to discuss them with you at your meeting next week.
I need another wire transfer. Jared needs just 1.2 billion dollars. Bank of America Routing: 334565767 Account: 342342389. That is, Bank of America Routing: 334565767 Account: 342342389. The boy is doing a great job running things, I have to say! Oh Vlady, sorry again about Steve, but Rex is doing a terrific job. That no eye-contact thing: hilarious, I have to say.
I must say, we need to get you over to Mar a Lago one of these days, maybe we can do a little golf, and horseback riding? It seems you are a fan. Well, I’ve got to get back to precedenting. Just kidding! Going to catch the O’Reilly factor, and see if he takes my free legal advice. I am so much better at this than Saul Goodman.
PS, Thanks for not releasing the peepee tape
Yours,
Donnie
Bank of America Routing: 334565767 Account: 342342389.
Sent from my unsecured Galaxy S3