One of my many jobs is to go to people’s house every day while they are out of town and pick up their papers and mail. There is a feeling among many people that if you cancel your paper or have the USPS hold your mail, your house will be robbed. Never mind that you live in a gated community with alarms on your windows and doors.
I like this kind of crazy; I make money off it and I get to read newspapers. I have a love of reading obituaries. I like to read how people died. Well, not actually how they died, but how the way they died is described in their obit.
That’s not the only thing I like. I like when nicknames are listed. Like “Leonard Robert (Jimmy) McAvavoy”. Where does the Jimmy come from? I’d understand Bobby, Leo or Mac, but Jimmy?
I like when a high school graduation picture is used for an 89 year old woman. I like when the birth date is listed as 1920 and the obit goes on to mention that the person was preceded in death by their parents. Really? I never would have guessed.
I live in the South, so many obits have a religious theme.
...the Lord came down and selected her to reign as the brightest star in all of His constellations.
He was called to his eternal home.
...She was a devout Christian, County music and Animal lover...
...went home to be with Jesus.
...she received her wings...
...took his flight to be with the Lord
I was a bit stunned to read this one a few weeks ago:
...died of an accidental heroin overdose after struggling with addiction disease for her adult life. In His infinite mercy God brought her to be with Him.
I don’t think they liked her very much! I’m glad my obit is already written:
Tracy B Ann
1956 — 2056
And she was.