Aug. 13, 2032 (Washington, D.C.) — President Donald Trump, Jr. today issued a national directive that all Approved Citizens shall, from this day onward, wear a lapel pin to display their support of the administration.
“The Greatest People of America should always show their respect to our nation’s most respected and revered leader,” said Vice Counsel of International Affairs (formerly the Secretary of State), Jared Kushner-Trump. “All patriotic Americans should be aware that, with the upcoming 2032 elections, only those with the official Donald Trump lapel emblem displayed will be able to exercise their Trump-decreed right to vote. We should all be grateful that, as the re-founding Father of our nation, President Trump has endowed all free white men with this right.”
The president is seeking a second 8-year term in office, against Secretary of the Interior, Kanye West.
The White House also announced that instead of a new website to report compliance with the nation’s Guiding Father, that all mobile devices would simply report all unapproved messaging content to the local Trumpian Immigration, Customs, Voting, and Treason Enforcement (TICVTE) offices.
“We must forever be vigilant against the voices of non-conformist, democracy-promoting traitors, who promote lies about global warming and other issues that will never come to pass,” said Vice President Sean Hannity, speaking aboard the U.S.S. Donald J. Trump, an amphibious class ship currently at sea, 20 feet above the former U.S. capital of Washington, D.C.
[This is your future, if you don’t get out the vote for Joe Biden and Kamala Harris.]