(This is Part Two of a diary about the gun fumbles (yes, plural) committed at public meetings by the Mayor of Hartford, Wisconsin, Timothy C. Michalak. Part One was published under the title, “Mayor Gunfumble Wants a Mulligan! (Part One).” Readers may appreciate the background information contained in the seven previously published “Mayor Gunfumble” diaries.)
The April 12th Hartford Common Council meeting was an exercise in official intransigence and arrogance. The Mayor and the Aldermen (Alderman Webb excepted) proved themselves unfit to serve. They strove to do one thing: sweep Michalak’s latest (!) gun fumble under the rug. This was the unwritten agenda item that nonetheless dominated the meeting, hanging over the Common Council table like a dark cloud. And the stench of Entitlement it gave off left the public wretching.
At the April 19th Common Council meeting, citizen input signaled a course change. It was a slight change, almost undetectable. Captain Clown was still at the helm, and Hartford City government is still listing waaaaay too far to starboard and in danger of capsizing. But a citizen mutiny is brewing. Three residents stood at the public microphone and, one by one, rebuked the Mayor and the indolent Aldermen. Once again, Alderman Webb spoke with integrity, this time to thank and defend these three citizens who exercised their First Amendment Rights and who criticized the mayor's reckless and antisocial actions.
The strangest remarks came from Alderman Kohler. I quote him verbatim. He began by saying:
“Yeah, um, I also wanna thank those who, um, who came forward and, um, exercised their, um, First Amendment Rights, by, um, freedom of speech...”
But soon it was clear that his “thanks” were dilatory.
“Not only have you guys turned around and went after the, uh, the mayor, but you also went after this entire staff here...” (He gestured at the Aldermen seated to either side of him.)
“...went after the mayor...” I wonder why that happened, Alderman. Did you look for clues? Did something happen? (Here's a hint: Did something happen three times?) He continued with:
“So, um, with that, do I take defense (sic)? No, but do I, do I open my eyes, and yes, and it makes you wonder how hard you want to work, and, fight for the things this city has done, in the last three years. Plus, in the last te-...six years, keeping the levy down, keeping the budgets on track, and, and, as well as keeping the city open, keeping the employees going through the pandemic...”
Alderman, most voters would simply call these things, “Doing the job you were elected to do.” But I interrupted your animated defense. Once more into the breach, Alderman!
“And if you guys don't know, the mayor, the man behind it is the guy you guys are after right now, the man who's behind it, who made it happen, who made it work, who worked with the county, who worked with the city, to get these open, who's had numerous calls, numerous, you know, bad and good to keep the city open, um, you know, are the ones you guys are looking at, would put hours and hours into this position that he is holding, that doesn't make much more than $8000.00 a year. So, when you guys think about how hard it is, um, to do this job...”
I will grant Kohler the trait of loyalty...but his loyalty is misplaced. Michalak is the kind of weasel who uses other people to say and do what he himself cannot say and do, since he would appear immodest. He embodies, in short, the best of the worst qualities to be found in a character like Iago, or a schemer like, say, Richard the Third.
Madcap Michalak has poured poison into your ear, Alderman. When you cite this list of things that Mayor Gunfumble has “achieved,” place it on a scale, and then insinuate that it outweighs his alleged crimes and his abuse of public trust and public safety, you mock the law, and you mock civil society.
The pigs who rule the barnyard in Orwell's “Animal Farm” declared that “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.” Alderman Kohler, do not insult the citizens of Hartford by casting this gun fumbling weasel as some kind of hero or uber-citizen. He gets no Gold Star for doing the job he was paid to do. And he certainly gets no Mulligan for committing an illegal act! No entitlement. Period. Washington County Government did the right thing when they got rid of this guy. Why can’t you?
This expose of Michalak's modus operandi has earned our Big-Fish-in-a-Small-Pond his newest moniker: Mayor Machiavelli.
Kohler's loyalty leads him into even more serious error. Here is the turn:
“...and how easy it is to blame somebody for having something happen, and not look at the entire story...”
Here is another instance of blame-shifting by use of a passive-tense sentence construction. We saw Michalak employ this technique in his so-called apology, which was quoted in Part One of this two-part diary. It was a deft example of Weasel-Speak.
Kohler says people are angry at Michalak“...for having something happen...” Phrasing it this way removes Gunfumble from the position of being the active agent. We're supposed to swallow the conceit that these gun fumbles just happen to him? That he can't help it? They're forced on him against his will? He can't do one single thing, one stupidly simple thing, to stop these public fumbles from happening?
Who here, Alderman, is not looking at the entire story? Let me hold up this mirror...
So citizen anger over Michalak's serial stupidities, his serial recklessness is...what, misplaced? It's wrong? This fool is blameless? Seriously? We’re supposed to pity the fool who can easily choose, like grown ups do, to leave his handgun at home? He's the victim here?
The poor guy! You're right. We can't go blaming the victim! How was he to know there was a holstered gun on his hip? I mean, handguns are like cockroaches! They’re everywhere! They’re always hiding in dark places! Gosh darn little pests! And we can't possibly expect Timmy to keep track of how many times he's fumbled it! This could've happened to any Man-Child! We have to let this go! What kind of latte-slurping, Prius-drivin' liberals are we, to go and blame Timmy for these gun fumbles that 'just keep happening' to him”?
Alderman Kohler, you were coached and you don't even realize it. You were groomed and you don’t even realize it. You've been used and you don't even realize it.
The most disturbing thing Kohler said in defense of Mayor Weasel-Speak came next:
“I just ask you guys to please, please, keep it to yourselves, keep it off of social media, and if you need to, contact us Councilmen.”
I...I cannot believe what I am reporting.
Alderman, you began your rambling defense of Juggles by thanking citizens who exercised their First Amendment Rights...
...and now, speaking from the other side of your mouth, you ask citizens, with a straight face, to stifle their First Amendment Rights when the target is your buddy, the gun-juggling clown who engages in a pattern, a pattern, of reckless, reckless, behavior!?!? You want angry citizens, justifiably angry citizens, to self-censor, to keep their mouths shut (!), when an infantile, antisocial misfit who is sorely in need of psychotherapy drops a loaded firearm three separate times at three separate public meetings? Do you even hear what you are saying???
You seriously expect citizens to contact the Aldermen who witnessed his fumbles...and who then did nothing? They did nothing! You seriously expect citizens to contact the same Aldermen who weren’t courageous, sober and civic-minded enough to take the initiative themselves? The Aldermen who didn’t report to their constituents what they saw, didn’t tell those constituents that the mayor was dangerous, reckless and needed to be removed? The Aldermen who didn’t unanimously declare that Madcap Michalak did not deserve reelection? Again, do you even hear what you are saying???
This is what Hartford citizens should expect for $8000.00 a year? The antics of a Man-Child whose unexamined fears tumble around in his head like a bag of rabid weasels? They should accept this antisocial troll who can't get through a day at work without either fondling or fumbling his handgun? Nothing about that seems a bit abnormal to you? Nothing? Nothing at all?
Let's take aim at Timmy’s, “acquired proclivity,” shall we? What is Michalak saying about his neighbors, his coworkers, and the world outside of his front door that he has to, has to (we're taking about addiction here) carry a firearm on his person? Trust issues, Timmy? You don't trust your neighbors, you don't trust your coworkers, you don't trust the people who vote in local elections or show up at Common Council meetings?
Your idiotic rationale, Timmy, when the topic of allowing guns into government meetings arose a few years back, was “I want to be able to send someone to Jesus before someone sends me to Jesus.” (Pause for another face-palm...) Thanks for that rote recitation of the Man-Child Motto...
Madcap remains oblivious to the fact that he will never, never be able to wield a handgun quickly enough or safely enough to protect himself! And this buffoon will never protect anyone else with that gun either! Incompetent!
But the most disturbing aspect of Madcap's psychodrama is the paradox that he wants to conceal-carry a handgun...and yet he wants everyone to know that he is carrying a handgun! You don't fumble a concealed handgun three times at three different public meetings, always in front of witnesses, unless some part of you wants to flaunt your supreme power. This kind of exhibitionism, this public flashing, is profoundly antisocial, and best dealt with in private therapy sessions. Once this flasher admits that he has a problem, and it is a deep-seated problem, he can begin to unpack and examine his behavior, guided by a therapist. But he must resign from his post as Mayor. Public office is his performance space. It aids and abets his dysfunction. It’s where he goes to get his “High.” And Hartford residents know that you don't buy an alcoholic a drink. You don't give "grocery money" to a drug addict.
“Once a corrupt practice takes root...
Alderman Kohler, you are defending a public menace, a man who needs private therapy, not public office. He's carrying around more than just a handgun he can't and won't control. He's carrying around psychological wounds, some of them from childhood. Open your eyes. Look at the bizarre behavior. Counsel him to resign. His gun fumbling antics, his glaring distrust of the people he represents, his contempt for them, this is what you, and the Indolent Enablers who sit beside you, want us to accept as the “New Normal”?
No.
Alderman, what’s that hiding behind you there? Is that...is that a weasel?
“Once a corrupt practice takes root...”
Common Council members, the sane citizens of Hartford are wondering, “How many gun fumbles will it take?” Have you Aldermen set a limit? What's the magic number? Is there a limit? Two per meeting? Any number of gun fumbles is okay, say, until he achieves an accidental discharge? How many misdemeanor charges will Juggles have to rack up before you stir from your slumbers?
April 19th was a dark day in Hartford, Wisconsin. The Common Council meeting, which lasted scarcely twenty one minutes, was an exercise in official intransigence and ideologically-induced blindness. “Good Buddy Gubmint” is still entrenched here. Trolls still rule the roost. "Nothing the matter here!" blurt the Aldermen when prodded from their entitlement-induced stupor. The only ray of hope came from three citizens who dared to confront Ichabod Clown and the Sleepy Hollow Gang. Excepting Alderman Webb, the other Aldermen were so spineless that they kept sliding out of their chairs. By the end of the meeting, they only evidence they had ever been present were the slime trails on their seats.