I spent most of the day car shopping. Mercedes, BMW, Audi? Damn car salesmen. One tried his best line of bullshit at selling me something that looked as hideous as the bloody Wagon Queen Family Truckster, so I decided to keep driving the Mini Cooper that has served me well for now.
I thought I could finish off this diary easily tonight, but I'm a bit out of practice with this. I've done this diary, off & on, for the past three years. However, it's been about 2 months since the last one. Putting it all together is always a pain, but I usually muddle through.
So without further ado, the standard warning for those of you who've never seen one of these before: If you would like to see some of the latest entertainment news, celebrity gossip and odd crap making the rounds, keep reading. However, if you are easily offended by half-nude men & women or other such things, you might want to stop right now.
You've been warned.
► [Does Size Really Matter?]
The new HBO series "Hung" has Thomas Jane starring as a down on his luck suburban Detroit high-school coach that is forced by the current economic conditions to rely on his only marketable asset for money; a big penis. Since I believe everything I see on TV, this begs the question of how lucrative might it be to turn oneself into a man-whore? And that leads back to the idea of size & whether it really does matter. I always found it amusing the amount of time & study put into the penis size entry on Wikipedia. If young women worry about things like breast size & how they compare to their peers, the analog to that with males seems to be the length & girth of their "fifth limb." In fact, for the more insecure members of the male persuasion it can lead to some rather pathetic avenues for compensation.
So what is normal? According to a comprehensive study of more than 40 independent penis size research projects with 11,000 participants done over the past 60 years puts the average erect size of the adult penis between 5.5 inches and 6.2 inches in length and 4.7 inches and 5.1 inches in girth.
Still wondering "does penis size matter," then the study also took a look at perceptions of size and asked more than 50,000 heterosexual men and women how they rated their own size or the size of their partner. They found that 85% of women were satisfied with their partner's penile size, but only 55% of men were satisfied. Notice anything? The women were much more forgiving and didn't feel like they were dealing with inferior goods if they weren't being bludgeoned with porn-star worthy penises. Chances are that women within measuring distance usually have better things on their minds than finding a ruler, and if they don't, penis size probably shouldn't be your first concern.
If you are truly concerned with your ability to fulfill your woman, try to learn all you can about satisfying her all round, and learning tips, techniques and positions that can maximize what you've got.
► [Plot Or No Plot?]
A couple weeks ago, I did a diary on film cliches. I almost added a section for adult films, since they also have some formulaic plots & full of often used cliches. Even if people fast forward through it, in both hard & soft core porn, the cliches are often used to explain why all of these people are having so much sex. For example, a frustrated or prudish woman who after an awakening sexual experience (maybe with the pizza boy) is somehow turned into a nymphomaniac that has sex with anything that moves. The 'Lady Chatterley' & 'Emmanuelle' films of the '70s & '80s are predicated on this idea, as well as a hell of a lot of other porn.
Well no less than the NY Times this week had an article about porn actors lamenting the loss of plot in today's porn, and shifting to just more... um... porn.
The actress known as Savanna Samson once relished preparing for a role. "I couldn’t wait to get my next script," she said. There’s no reason to look at them anymore, she said, because her movies now call almost exclusively for action. Specifically, sex... Some in the industry would prefer their sex with a little more character development.
Ms. Samson, for example, said she took her acting seriously and used to prepare studiously for her roles, like the character she played in the 2006 movie "Flasher." She said she played a psychotic who, because of the way her mother treated her, "had an obsession with flashing and doing things in public."
"I used to have dialogue," said Ms. Samson, whose given name is Natalie Oliveros, and who is one of the industry’s biggest stars. "Getting it on in one hardcore scene after another just isn’t as much fun," she added.
As alluded to above, a major reason for why this is happening is the internet. Porn on the internet "has made it easy to watch snippets of video", instead of sitting through "acting" between sex scenes.
► [Movie & Television News]
An Injury To One Is An Injury To All:
"There's one thing I always meant to ask Jack. Back in the old days, I wanted to know about that Doctor of his. The man who appears out of nowhere and saves the world, except sometimes he doesn't. All those times in history when there was no sign of him, I wanted to know, why not? But I don't need to ask anymore. I know the answer now. Sometimes the Doctor must look at this planet & turn away in shame. I'm recording this in case anyone ever finds it, so you can see... you can see how the world ended."
Even though I've seen every episode of the new "Doctor Who", I had never watched an episode of "Torchwood" before seeing "Torchwood: Children of Earth", a five hour miniseries within the "Whoniverse." With "Children of Earth", Russel T. Davies has created a pretty effective & chilling story that uses the idea at the heart of Ursula K. Le Guin's "The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas."
If tomorrow, an alien Eldritch Abomination that we hardly undersood landed on Earth, and demands a horrible sacrifice in order for the continued survival of the human race, should we comply? Or should we fight back, resist, and risk all seven billion lives on Earth? To borrow a phrase from "Star Trek", do the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one? That is at the core of "Children of Earth." To me, the most frightening moment in the five hours doesn't actually involve the alien abomination, but occurs in hour 4 with the British Prime Minister & MPs sitting around a conference table discussing how to go about responding to the aliens' demand. It's frightening because it feels all too real & possible. In fact, one spin-doctor (played by Nicholas Briggs, the voice of the Daleks & Cybermen) counsels the Prime Minister that the sacrifice could be sold to the public as "good", given that it will have a positive environmental impact on Earth.
"Children of Earth" premiers on BBC America July 20th, and I couldn't recommend it enough.
The Pacific: A lot has been released since the last time I've done one of these, including the trailer for the follow-up to the World War II miniseries "Band of Brothers" from Tom Hanks and Steven Spielberg. Based on both "With The Old Breed" by E.B. Sledge and "Helmet For My Pillow" by Robert Leckie, this time we follow the Marines as they fight their way across the Pacific.
Other stories making the rounds.....
- "Mythbusters" Will Test Star Trek’s Gorn Cannon
- AFTRA, SAG merger still far off
- Why Hulu Succeeded as Other Video Sites Failed
- "It may be an honest admission that Hollywood finally has run out of ideas, but this week's announcement that DreamWorks is developing a movie based on the View-Master couldn't come at a more fitting moment"
- Atari Video Game 'Asteroids' Gets the Big Screen Treatment
- 'Seabiscuit' screenwriter Gary Ross is rewriting 'Spider-Man 4', due to enter production next year
- The Return of 'Remo Williams'??
- The first eight minutes of Kathryn Bigelow’s amazing war film 'The Hurt Locker'
- Older geeks fear teenage and pre-teen geeks will spill gooey 'Twilight' all over their Comic-Con... Because walking around in a shitty Stormtrooper costume is serious business, and can't be bothered by glittering vampires
Twilighters can do their own thing, and it really doesn’t affect me at all... except for when it does. And the one time it might is at a place called Comic-Con.
- John Woo To Direct International War Epic About 'The Flying Tigers'
- 'Moneyball' Still Rolling at Sony, Aaron Sorkin Up to Bat
- Ryan Reynolds is the Green Lantern
- Harold Ramis Discusses The Development Of GHOSTBUSTERS 3
- "Middlesex", the novel by Jeffrey Eugenides ("The Virgin Suicides") that won both a Pulitzer Prize and a slot in Oprah’s Book Club, has been optioned by HBO, which hopes to turn it into an hourlong series
- Samuel L. Jackson has had it with motherfuckin' critics on the motherfuckin' net: "So I tell them, 'I know my face, you know my face. I want to see you. Meet me at this place here and let's have that discussion'"
- Michael Moore’s 'Capitalism: A Love Story'
- Jennifer’s Body Photo Reveals Megan Fox’s Bloody Bite
- As Cable Networks Abandon Their Roots To Grab Audience, Where Do The Niches Go?
- The plot from Tron 2
- Rumor: Will 'Blade' prequel center on Deacon Frost?
- Kristen Stewart is one scary looking actress as she sits on the steps of her trailer Wednesday while filming 'The Runaways'
- Harrison Ford Returning for 'Indiana Jones 5'?
- Superman may return soon in Green Lantern movie, as well as one of his own after Warner Bros. & DC Comics won a favorable ruling in the suit filed by the heirs of "Superman" co-creator Jerome Siegel
The judge, who conducted a 10-day bench trial, also noted that Warner Bros. chairman Alan Horn had testified that he hopes to make another "Superman" movie but added that the property wasn't under development at the studio, that no script had been written and that the earliest another "Superman" pic could be released would be in 2012.
- ‘Brüno’ And Friends In The Greatest Photo EVER!
- ‘Bruno’ Struts To #1 In Saturday’s Box Office Report
- From Page to Screen: 'World War Z'
- Brit viewers tell BBC to lay off the Jackson action
- Will Forte's bumbling spy "MacGruber" is headed for the bigscreen as the latest in a long line of "Saturday Night Live" characters to make that transition
- It's been 10 years since "The Blair Witch Project." Where were you when this crappy, one-joke, overhyped piece of crap crapped its way into movie theaters?
- Syfy in talks to revive "Quantum Leap" & "Alien Nation"
- 'T.J. Hooker' will patrol bigscreen
- 15 'Gulp! You Scare Me!' Actors
- Mel Gibson is in talks to take the lead role in a film directed by & co-starring Jodie Foster called 'The Beaver', about a depressed man who finds solace in his beaver hand-puppet
- Photos From Drew Barrymore’s 'Whip It'
- Monty Python Turns 40 & Reunites This Fall
- Optimus Prime loves "Sex and the City"
- Cameron Diaz in talks for 'Green Hornet'
- Live-action 'Star Wars' TV series in preproduction in Australia?
- Seth Rogen Might Be Taking a Road Trip With... Barbra Streisand!
- Kristen Bell Doesn’t Think a "Veronica Mars" Movie Will Ever Happen
- Does "Heroes" need more lesbians?
- ThinkGeek Actually Making Tauntaun Sleeping Bag
- Why Are Movie Threequels Always So Terrible?
- George Clooney as Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan?
- Francis Lawrence and Will Smith to Reunite for 'City That Sailed', probably signaling no 'I Am Legend' prequel
- The Universe Doesn’t Hate Us: No Heathers Sequel
- Is Brian Azzarello’s "100 Bullets" Being Developed as an HBO Series?
- 'I've Always Been Here!!' An Intriguing Clip From EPITAPH ONE, The ‘Lost’ Whedon-Directed Episode Of DOLLHOUSE!!
- Slightly more than 31 million people tuned in for Michael Jackson's Staples Center memorial service Tuesday
- Do you want a happy ending for "Lost"?
- Kate Beckinsale Claims Libel Damages Over False Barbarella Claims
- Lindsay Lohan Turned Down Role in 'The Hangover' Because She Didn't Like The Script
- Speaking of 'The Hangover', is it just a better, more realistic version of 'Dude Where's My Car!!?'
- Wolfman Reshoots Say "Four Legs Good, Two Legs Bad"
- How Terry Gilliam saved Heath Ledger's final movie
- First Look At 'Kick Ass'
- Megan Fox's audition for 'Transformers' involved washing Michael Bay's Ferrari while he taped it... This bit of news comes after Bay & Fox started fighting each other in the press
- Time to lose the obsession with prequels and origins stories?
- 'Scooby-Doo' director takes on 'Smurfs' movie
- Zooey Deschanel set for 'Highness', joins cast including James Franco & Danny McBride
- Francis Ford Coppola wanted Martin Scorsese to direct 'Godfather Part II'
- Why Or Why Didn’t The HD Video Look Of 'Public Enemies' Work For You?
- Hope Davis to play Hillary Clinton, Replacing Julianne Moore
- First Look At Cobra Commander In Thee 'G.I. Joe' Japanese Movie Trailer
- A Supercool Trailer Emerges For NBC’s Postapocalyptic Midseason Drama "DAY ONE"
- 2012: It’s A Disaster!
- Comedy Central Orders A Sitcom From EASTBOUND & DOWN’s Will Ferrell & Adam McKay, starring "Napoleon Dynamite" star Jon Heder
- First Look At Wes Anderson’s 'Fantastic Mr. Fox'
- Directors, Screenwriters and Actors on Twitter
- Tobey Maguire is set to star in 'The Details'
- The Worst Reviewed Highest Grossing Movie Of All-Time? 'Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen' has passed $600 million worldwide despite a 19% fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes
- First Look: The Da Vinci Code Sequel 'The Lost Symbol'
Movie Trailers: If you have problems with the embedded players below, or want to see other recently released teasers & trailers, click here.
- Inglourious Basterds - International Trailer
► [Music News]
Online Royalty Deal: Internet radio may survive after all. Maybe. In 2007, a federal royalty board ruled that all webcasters must pay a fee (19 cents a song next year) every time they streamed a song for a listener. Webcasters like Pandora argued that their sites actually allow people to discover music that people then go out & buy, and these fees would effectively put them out of business & eat up capital. On Tuesday, online radio made a deal with record labels for royalties.
The new agreement treats sites differently depending on their size and business model. It applies to companies that make most of their money from streaming music, so webcasters like CBS Radio, which runs online music services for AOL and Yahoo, are not part of it. It covers the period from 2006 through 2015 for big sites and through 2014 for small sites.
Webcasters with significant advertising revenue, like Pandora or Slacker, will pay the greater of 25 percent of revenue or a fee each time a listener hears a song, starting at .08 cent for songs streamed in 2006 and increasing to .14 cent in 2015. Pandora had $19 million in revenue last year and expects that to rise to $40 million this year.
Small sites with less than $1.25 million in revenue, like AccuRadio, Digitally Imported and RadioIO, will pay 12 to 14 percent of it in royalties. All stations will be required to pay an annual minimum fee of $25,000, which they can apply to their royalty payments. Webcasters also agreed to give more detailed information about the songs they play and how many people listen to them to SoundExchange, the nonprofit organization that collects and distributes digital royalties on behalf of artists and labels.
Recently, there was a bit of a brouhaha when iTunes raised the price for some songs in response to music industry pressure. On a lot of places on the internet, the move was decried as being too much. However, the record companies' argument was exemplified by Atlantic's Julie Greenwald in an interview she did last month with Elle. Greenwald was a longtime fixture at Def Jam records before moving over to Atlantic records where she is currently the COO. Her argument for $1.29 per song is basically this:
"These writers are focusing on, 'Why are they going to $1.29?' It's like, Hi, you're drinking a cup of coffee that someone made in a machine that didn't have to think. And my artist went into a studio and worked really hard to create something beautiful that you're going to buy for less money than a cup of coffee and have for a lifetime, that could be the song that you dance to at your wedding or at your prom, or gets you through a breakup, or just gives you joy because you watch your toddler dance to it. You think I'm getting rich off $1.29 today? Or my artist is? It's criminal."
Charts: Through the magic of , you can click on any of the song titles below & hear that particular track.
The top 10 songs on Billboard's Hot 100 are.....
- The Black Eyed Peas - "I Gotta Feeling"
- The Black Eyed Peas - "Boom Boom Pow"
- Drake - "Best I Ever Had"
- Keri Hilson Featuring Kanye West & Ne-Yo - "Knock You Down"
- Lady Gaga - "LoveGame"
- Sean Kingston - "Fire Burning"
- Jeremih - "Birthday Sex"
- Pitbull - "I Know You Want Me"
- Taylor Swift - "You Belong With Me"
- Linkin Park - "New Divide"
The Top 10 Songs in the United States at the iTunes Store are.....
- The Black Eyed Peas - "I Gotta Feeling"
- Hannah Montana - "He Could Be The One"
- Sean Kingston - "Fire Burning"
- The Black Eyed Peas - "Boom Boom Pow"
- Mariah Carey - "Obsessed"
- Michael Jackson - "Man In The Mirror"
- Taylor Swift - "You Belong With Me"
- Boys Like Girls - "Love Drunk"
- Drake - "Best I Ever Had"
- Lady Gaga - "LoveGame"
Other music news circulating around the series of tubes.....
"I was reading a review of a movie called Watchmen that uses it, and the reviewer said, ‘Can we please have a moratorium on ‘Hallelujah’ in movies and television shows?’ and I kind of feel the same way," Cohen told the Guardian. "I think it’s a good song, but too many people sing it."
► [Gratuitous Links & Pics]
Other News & Crap
- The 7 Stages of First-Time Sex with Someone.....
Shortly after psyching yourself up for sex, you'll start to think about the physical state of your balls, and how that might effect the outcome of your evening. How long has it been since you last showered? Do your balls smell like the lunch buffet at an Indian restaurant? What pants are you wearing today? The ones that breathe pretty well, or some stuffy jeans that you found in your dirty laundry underneath a jerk off sock? When is the last time you trimmed your pubes? Did you wipe your ass really well after the last time you dropped a deuce? All of these things will run through your mind in a millisecond. Imagine that you're a small, malnourished Phillipino child at the end of a Nike assembly line: if you've missed something and you don't catch it, there's a good chance your day is going to end with someone saying, "go back to the hole you came from. You disgust me!"
- Does Joe Jackson have designs on making Michael Jackson's children into performers?... Speaking Of Michael Jackson’s Kids, Guardianship Hearing Delayed -- Again
- CNN and ABC News are reporting Michael Jackson's Body was riddled with needle marks when he died, and speaking of his body, reports have it being stored in a crypt while the family fights
- City Of Los Angeles: "Okay, so we went a little overboard for the MJ Memorial. Okay, okay, we went a LOT overboard in the MJ memorial. But wouldn't you still like to help us pay for our stupidity?"
- A woman possessed by the "most beautifiliest angel lusefer" and claims to be the "reincarnation of Venus Aphrodite Demilo" has filed a $3 billion lawsuit against Hugh Hefner, suing him for... well... it's nearly impossible to tell
- Ben Affleck says JLo was bad for his career
- Want to take a picture with Patrick Stewart (AKA Captain Picard)? That'll be $200 please
- Kelly Preston to Break Silence About Losing Her Son
- "Renegade" star Lorenzo Lamas left his fourth wife, former Playboy model Shauna Sand, when he discovered she was sleeping with A.J. Lamas, his then-18-year-old son
- Entertainment Tonight was in Los Angeles Thursday night as Chaz Bono walked his first red carpet since the news broke that he was transitioning from female to male
- There’s no love lost between Chanel’s couturier Karl Lagerfeld and Audrey Tautou
- Roman Polanski files appeal in effort to have sex case dropped
- How To Score With A Bridesmaid At A Wedding
- Lindsay Lohan, or "Skulls O'Grady" as she'll now be called, locked herself out of Samantha Ronson's house last night and eventually broke in. But not before calling a locksmith who she refused to pay
- Jude Law's New Friend
- Jason Bateman: Drugs Almost Cost Me My Marriage
- Kevin Jonas of the Jonas Brothers asked his girlfriend Danielle Deleasa to marry him with a ring made up of 210 round pave diamonds
- Scarlett Johansson & Ryan Reynolds To Adopt
- Projectile Vomiting - A Gallery
- Jamie Foxx laid into Rihanna during a party at Tao in Las Vegas the other night
- The Howard Stern Show's Artie Lange Arrested for Suspicion of DUI in Jersey
- Britney Spears popping diet pills before shows
- Jim Carrey To Be A Granddad
- James Franco knows how to give a speech
- Three Too Many? Joyce DeWitt (AKA Janet from "Three's Company") Busted for DUI
- I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of 'Twilight' fans suddenly cried out in terror... Robert Pattinson has apparently dumped Kristen Stewart
- Is Morgan Freeman Going To Marry His Step-Granddaughter?
- Who Should Bradley Cooper Date: Renee Zellweger or Jennifer Aniston?
- What happens when young hot women take pictures of themselves in various suggestive poses for their boyfriends? Their boyfriends upload 'em onto the internet
- Kal Penn Begins New Job as White House Liaison
The Guys
The Ladies