Please do not recommend this diary. I'm writing it strictly for the purposes of clearing the air, and clearing my name. I seriously contemplated leaving here for good after everything that happened over the past couple of weeks, but ultimately I decided that I would like to stay, and continue writing about child sexual abuse and the other topics that I am passionate about. But some pretty atrocious things were (and still are) being said about me, the people who were kind enough to come to my defense, and worst of all, about my charity Tree Climbers. That is the main reason why I'm writing this-the allegation that I would use the cause of child sexual abuse to commit fraud is simply something I cannot let stand.
So, for the record...
1. I am not a sockpuppet
My name is Rebecca Berry and I live in CT. Here is my drivers license, nursing license, hospital ID bracelet and for good measure the business card that was given to me by officer Kyle Noddin after I filed a police report against "The Nephew"
[EDITED OUT-enough people have seen it!]
Here is an article by the nationally syndicated columnist Diane Dimond, where she refers to meeting me in person at the Jerry Sandusky trial, and also references the diary I wrote on Daily Kos called "Fuck Joe Paterno":
http://www.thedailybeast.com/...
After Sandusky’s arrest in November 2011, Connecticut nurse Rebecca Berry obsessively followed every development. She attended each day of the trial in Bellefonte, Pa., and on June 22, the night the packed courtroom waited to hear the verdict, Berry sat in the back of the room taking in great gulps of air, her face red, tears streaming down it. As a survivor of repeated childhood rapes by her best friend’s stepfather, Berry was fighting a cacophony of emotions. She had never had the occasion to face her abuser in court, she told The Daily Beast, yet she felt compelled to watch what happened to Sandusky. Months earlier, upon hearing platitudes for the late Penn State coach Joe Paterno upon his death, Rebecca’s passion for supporting survivors took hold of her. She penned a caustic and widely read post at the Daily Kos titled, “F@*k Joe Paterno,” which graphically outlined the psychological fate of child-abuse victims (using herself as an example) and condemned the entire Penn State hierarchy for doing nothing to determine precisely why Sandusky had allegedly been taking campus showers with young boys since at least 1998.
“I have no guilt or shame about saying to every single person who knew, who suspected, who was outright told and passed the buck on to someone else while children were being raped by grown men ... Fuck you for not doing your goddamn job or fulfilling your most basic moral obligation as an adult to protect children who were being harmed.” Berry’s post prompted thousands of comments and immediately went viral between survivors and their support sites
Apparently some people said that this proves nothing, because it might not have even been me in the courthouse...aside from the fact that it talks specifically about the diary I wrote, you can't get a public pass without a photo ID. In fact, I had to make a round trip back to Connecticut on the first day because I forgot mine. And here is my public pass (from the day that the verdict was read)
I had no contact with "The Nephew" before May 22nd, 2012. This was the first PM I sent to him:
2. TREE Climbers is NOT defrauding the Daily Kos community
First, a quote from my co-founder Roxine Behrens:
Tree Climbers, Inc., is a registered non-profit with the state of Maryland. We submitted our comleted 1023 in April and are awaiting our final determination.
At my insistence, we are NOT actively fundraising until I have in my hands, the determination letter from the IRS.
Why?
Although legally, we can operate as a fully functioning 501(c)(3), I have decided to take a more cautious approach. Because this is my first time ever starting a non-profit, I have decided to proceed prudently - to ensure all of my t's are crossed and i's are dotted before launching a full-fledged fundraising effort. I submitted an application that was 40-50 pages in length. And while I labored over it and was meticulous about doing everything right, I won't know that I did until I get that paper.
That's not to say we don't have things in the wings - ready to run with once we're approved.
I have been approached by the Red Door Salon who has requested a proposal from me as they are interested in running a national campaign for our charity.
Rebecca and I are working on Bearing Witness: The Jerry Sandusky Trial and are shopping publishers. ALL proceeds of this book will go directly to the non-profit.
I am planning a golf fundraiser in my local community, am exploring an annual 5K run, and already have meetings set up with local governmental offices and charities in the fall to see how we can best work together.
I will say again, the IRS code says we are allowed to operate as a fully functioning 501(c)(3), solicit funds, write for grants, etc., and as long as our application is approved by the end of the calender year (which is December 31, 2012), all donations from the date the application was filed, are fully tax deductible.
For the record, neither Rebecca nor I have taken one dime from this charity. We have worked non-stop for the past 6 months to get it up and running with no compensation. On top of that, I have a full-time job, am working on my MBA, and we both have families to take care of, I have a husband and two sons, she has a daughter.
Why are we doing this?
Because we were compelled - by 8 young men who stood up and told their truth in Pennsylvania. Because they spoke, we spoke. And after seeing what happened when we stood up and told OUR truths, we decided to launch TREE Climbers - Tell, Recover, Educate, Empower.
Will we make mistakes along this journey? Absolutely. If starting a non-profit was easy, anyone would do it. Ask any business man or woman who's started something from the ground up if they don't make mistakes.
To date we have put together a website full of resources to help other victims, survivors, and families of survivors. We've received numerous comments and emails from people who have NEVER spoken about their abuse - who found value and worth in our work.
There hasn't been much action on our website because we were in Bellefonte, PA for three weeks covering the Jerry Sandusky trial.
When we returned, we put together the book for the young men who testified and started writing about our experiences with the Jerry Sandusky trial.
Proof that we applied for 501(c)3 status with the IRS:
Here is the section of the law that states we are allowed to operate as a 501(c) even while our status is pending:
Link: http://www.irs.gov/...
While an organization’s Form 1023 is waiting for approval from the IRS, the organization may operate as a tax-exempt organization.
Here we are on
Maryland Nonprofits:
And here are pictures of the books we had made for the Penn State survivors:
And, not for nothing but if I am running some kind of fraud, I'm pretty bad at it because I'm pretty darn poor. That's why I'm on HUSKY A:
[Edited out-enough people have seen it]
The annual income limit for a family of 2 is $26,954.00. I have been living at or below the Federal Poverty Line for about 5 years now.
3. I had a very good reason for deleting that diary
First, as I promised I would, I sent a copy of the police report to Markos and Meteor Blades. But since they have not weighed in publicly, you can see it for yourselves:
EDIT-For the record-since someone asked me about this, the date on the police report (July 14th) is the date it was FILED and archived, not the date it was taken. Farmington PD is a small town department and understaffed, and it's standard for there to be at least 1-2 days before a report is finalized.
Second-The reason I was confusing in my comments is because (a) I was sleep deprived, at one point slightly drunk, and on the urge of a nervous breakdown and (b) I was given conflicting information from law enforcement.
The main reason I asked to have the diary deleted was because of a domestic situation that broke out literally at the same time it was posted. I will not get into the details of what happened, but it concerns some of the comments that were made in the diary, including a few I stupidly made after drinking a little too much wine. After it became apparent that this person was NOT being taken into custody, which is something I was told by Raleigh PD, those comments became a potential source of danger for two completely innocent people caught up in all of this. So for those of you who had a good chuckle at my frantic "check your Kosmail" comments to Timeaus, that was why. I was desperately trying to get his attention. Furthermore, I was going off of less than 3 days of sleep, and my brain was barely functioning. So I might not have made a lot of sense.
In the way of proof-Screenshots from my phone showing that I was in contact with both Raleigh PD (the unredacted number) and this person's wife (blocked out number) throughout the night, at the same time the diary was up:
Text message with his wife where I say "I need to speak with the responding officer"
4. I had a very good reason for "disappearing" from Daily Kos
I was in the hospital. I was in the hospital because I had barely slept in 5 days,for starters, and I wasn't eating, or drinking, or doing anything to really take care of myself because I was so freaked out. I have been dealing with some pretty heavy stuff for about 5 months-Talking about my sexual abuse for the first time, serious issues with my family, and attending the Sandusky trial. All of this was extremely difficult to deal with, and my response to it was simply not to deal with it at all. So when this all went down-and please remember that I legitimately was in fear for my life-I just snapped. I lost it. I was diagnosed with an adjustment disorder:
Adjustment disorder is a group of symptoms, such as stress, feeling sad or hopeless, and physical symptoms that can occur after you go through a stressful life event.
The symptoms occur because you are having a hard time coping, and the reaction is stronger or greater than what would be expected for the type of event that occurred.
Symptoms
Symptoms of adjustment disorder are often severe enough to affect work or social life. Some of the symptoms include:
•Acting defiant or showing impulsive behavior
•Acting nervous or tense
•Crying, feeling sad or hopeless, and possibly withdrawing from other people
•Skipped heartbeats and other physical complaints
•Trembling or twitching
To have adjustment disorder, you must meet the following criteria:
•The symptoms clearly come after a stressor, most often within 3 months
•The symptoms are more severe than would be expected
•There do not appear to be other disorders involved
•The symptoms are not part of normal grieving for the death of a loved one
On occasion, symptoms can be severe and the person may have thoughts of suicide or make a suicide attempt.
At the time of my admission, my blood pressure was 160/100 (my baseline is 110/60) my pulse rate was 150 and my EKG was abnormal. My platelets and WBC's were elevated indicating that I had suffered arterial damage as a result of the stress I was under. I had gone for days without sleeping, I was dehydrated, and incoherent. And yes, I was feeling suicidal. I was admitted for 3 days. Considering I am on Medicaid, the fact that I was admitted at all-let alone that I spent 3 days there-should tell you something about how sick I was.
Anyways, I'm doing fine now. Much better, actually. And I would like to move on from this, probably more than just about anyone here. Hopefully I will be allowed to do that now.
If you have anything ugly or abusive to say in the comments, know that I won't be reading or responding to them. I encourage you to keep it civil, but I'm not the comment police. If you have something you would like to say to me directly, send it in a PM. If you have any questions about "The Nephew" and his various socks, ask admin. This is the last thing I will ever have to say on this topic.
Peace.
5:48 PM PT: Forgot to add...but this comment may help add some clarity as well:
http://www.dailykos.com/...
7:59 PM PT: For the record-since someone brought this up to me, the date on the police report is the date it was FILED and archived, not the date it was taken. Farmington PD is a small town department and understaffed, and it's standard for there to be at least 1-2 days before a report is finalized.
Also, I edited out some of my personal info since I figure enough people have seen it by now.
UPDATE-Before you come here and ask me WHY I feel the need to do this, read this comment by hardart:
want to apologize also(17+ / 0-)
for my comment in a diary that read .
.God i hate to say this but.. (23+ / 0-)
i am thinking the same thing here as others are saying and implying..... i hope that i am wrong. but the comments by SJF in the diary that was supposed to clear things up didnt make sense at all and as others pointed out here they seemed very Nephew-esque. more drama and the whole police thing didnt read as real to me. sorry but i am SO. OVER. THIS. from the get go i new that the Nephew was a fake. i participated in the very first treeclimbers diary and wrote about my be sexually abused by my uncle. i privately messaged SJF my real life name and she included one of my paintings in the diary and my story. It was an emotional experience for me. the first i have ever written about it. and now i feel like the drama of all this is just never ending and irritating and sad. As i said i hope i am wrong about SJF but it all seems so preposterous. and please dont hiderate my comment. i think this is a time and place to air all this. i never spoke up about my suspicions about the Nephew. yes i am willing to say i could be wrong about ALL this. ugh.
i have such a hard time trusting people and i was freaking out at the time thinking what if none of this is real. the whole Nephew thing.. just pushed a lot of buttons for me. and then there kept on being different layers.. multiple socks.. well it just made me feel somehow violated. Glad you are here. hug to you.
Many on this site, like hardart, confided in me and shared some very personal and sensitive information. I take that very seriously, and I know firsthand how violating it feels to trust someone only to find out they are a fraud. The idea that any survivor would feel violated by me is not something I could live with.