I never imagined I would write a public diary, much less one that is driven by desperation and panic…much less one here on DK.
Please bear with me.
While I have never commented here on DK, I am one of your silent Kossacks, devouring diaries multiple times daily: I celebrate and laugh and cry and rage and RESIST with each of you. From TeacherKen, BrooklynBadBoy, Jen Hayden, The Village Resistance (every one of you are my hero/shero), Mark Sumner, nancyjones (best avatar ever), Murfster, Angela Marx, Wee Mama, El Mito (what art!), to my nightly “Good Night” read by rserven and Meteor Blade’s Open Thread for Night Owls – and ALL you other Kossacks – you fill my life with more than I can ever express, give me comfort in a world gone mad. Know that your voices, even when I may disagree, are not only heard, but valued.
In advance, I thank you for reading this and for not looking away.
My darling mother, Vira, has recently been diagnosed with terminal ovarian cancer. Having exhausted all possibilities, we have been unable to find the financial help we so desperately need. Until Vira’s diagnosis we were managing month to month, but were “stable” nonetheless. Since March, the additional costs associated with Vira’s cancer have now left us literally penniless.
It is important that you, dear reader, know this: Vira was born into abject poverty in 1929 New York City; she became deaf from spinal meningitis at age 7 and spent her childhood in institutional deaf schools. She was whip-smart and began her college studies at Gallaudet at age 16 (Vira Zuk, class of '50!). Vira’s marriage to a hearing serviceman ended when he abandoned her in 1969, leaving her to raise 4 brats children alone. While she found a career within the Federal government, the paygrade for women of her generation allowed her to only move from poor to working-poor though she worked for decades. Her retirement and social security always just enough to keep her from benefiting from other possible safety nets. It has always been just enough. But not this time.
Some may wonder why I am not currently working: I have been searching for work for 11 months (unemployment ended in January), applying to both professional social work and minimum-wage retail/manual labor positions. Unfortunately, my 23-years ago felony record continues to impact my employability. Societal barriers and oppressive, archaic policies do not take into consideration what I have accomplished since my release from prison in 1996, including earning both bachelor and master degrees in Social Work; and while I am continuing to submit applications, I am not confident anything will happen soon enough. I shake my fist at ceiling cat daily, in anger and in query: what more must I do to overcome my felonious past before I am allowed to fully rejoin society?
While Vira’s diagnosis has been difficult to process, what is truly heartbreaking is the toll our financial situation is having on her. The unknowing if we will be evicted in June, or if the electric will be turned off, or do we pay car insurance or buy food, and on and on. The stress of the daily struggle to find any financial support has become unbearable.
And so, my dear Kossack and fellow human being, I am reduced to pleading for your help. Please don’t look away. We are here and we so desperately need your help.
Two small words, small in content, ginormous in intent, wrapped in deep appreciation: Thank You.
https://www.gofundme.com/dying-at-home-w-dignity-for-vira