Unless there is some serious brokering about to happen, Sen. Ted Cruz has been mathematically eliminated from becoming the Republican presidential nominee. He’s not the nominee. In fact, he’s not even close. Yet, today, he announces that Carly Fiorina will be his running mate.
How the f**k can Ted Cruz and Carly Fiorina be running mates?
Are they maybe running a 5K? I can see Carly pulling this one off, but I don’t see Ted running anywhere unless the collective guilt and regret from all of his life choices is chasing him.
Going to cross that one off the list.
Oh, I know! Fiorina sang today.
Yes. That actually happened. Maybe they’re running a SHOW together. Maybe they’re doing a horrible, brain bleeding version of ‘Ted Cruz Superstar’ in which Carly sings about not knowing how to love him. Don’t worry Carly, no one knows because no one does. Except maybe his wife. Maybe.
My point is that no one is falling for the Hail Mary that Ted and Carly pulled today. We all know it’s nothing but a desperate stunt to get Trump bumped off the media cycle for say, oh, four hours or so, (Not that we fault him for that. I mean, if he weren’t even worse than him we’d be thanking Ted, but whatever...)
Anyway, I’m going to go with my final guess that they both just decided to run off the proverbial political cliff together where they will fall into a frothy sea of irrelevance surviving solely on arrogance and denialism.
I can cheer for that.