The Boy Conservatives Who Cried Wolf
An Aesop's Fable -- updated for modern times
There once was a Political Party who was bored as they sat down at their dining establishment, watching the villagers voting, for the guy they really didn't like very much. To amuse themselves they took a great breath and cried out in unison, "Wolf! Wolf! The Wolf is chasing the sheep!"
The villagers came running up the chambers on the Hill to help the Conservatives investigate the wolf away. But when they arrived at the end of each Investigation, they found no wolf. The Conservative Party laughed at the sight of their angry faces.
"Don't cry 'wolf', GOP Boys," said the villagers, "when there's no wolf!" They went grumbling back to their lives, away from the Hill.
Later, the Conservatives Issa and Graham and Cruz cried out again, "Wolf! Wolf! The wolf is indebting the sheep!" To their naughty delight, they watched the villagers run up to the Hill, only to find All its doors had been shut down. Apparently to keep the wolf out ... (and apparently as some sort a tribute to Dr Suess, too).
When the villagers saw No Wolf secretly tearing up their retirement security, they sternly said, "Save your frightened song and dance, for when there is really something wrong! Don't cry 'wolf' when there is NO wolf!"
But the GOP Boys just grinned and watched them go grumbling back to their lives, down from the Hill, once more.
Later, the Conservative Want-a-bee Presidents, saw a REAL wolf prowling about their middle-eastern flock. Alarmed, they leaped to their feet and cried out in unison again, as loudly as they could, "Wolf! Wolf!"
But the villagers thought they were trying to fool them again, and so they didn't come running, to their latest fear-monging threats.
At sunset, everyone wondered why the Conservative Cantor hadn't returned to the village with their sheep's daily wool. So they went up the Hill to find the MIA GOP Boys. They found them weeping.
"There really was a wolf here! But our selfish me-centered, ditto-head flock has scattered! I cried out, "Wolf!" Why didn't you come?"
An old tired man tried to comfort one of the 'Young Guns', as they walked back to the village.
"We'll help you look for your shrinking base's vote in the morning," he said, putting his check-writing arm around the youth, "But, Nobody believes a liar -- NOT even when he is telling the truth!"
If only it was ...
The End.
But the Conservative Party for some strange reason, is still -- after all that -- still entrusted with "guarding the Villagers' sheep."
Go Figure.